The crew sees the interior of Sleepmonger House.
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@funcityventures is the show on twitter
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@bijanstephen is Remy, the Sleeper (human) Blooder
@randwiches is Merkis, the Jalasti Banshee
@nicholasguercio is Vynos, the Conscript (human) Tremulant
and @shodell is Beta, the Shoodtha Pir
@taylordotbiz is Oat
@mikerugnetta is Zeshdano Navelle
@hollowearths is everything else
--
This episode of Float City was recorded in various locations across Brooklyn New York. It was produced, edited and sound designed by Mike Rugnetta.
Pixlriffs answerd, O thou little virgin of the peaceful valley.
Giving to those that cannot crave, the voiceless, the o'erfired.
Thy breath doth nourish the innocent lamb, he smells thy milky garments,
He crops thy flowers.
Our music is by Sam Tyndall - https://www.samtyndall.com/
with a track this episode from Will Savino - https://wsavino.com/
Remy's flute playing is by Jake Fridkis - https://instagram.com/flutebros
Our art is by Tess Stone - http://notdrunkenough.com/
Float City's art is by Ethan Gould - https://www.instagram.com/spectralhouse/
Our Discord mods are Olivia Gulin, Kelly McKew, Kit Pulliam and Kestrel
And the voice of Artemis is Molly Templeton
[ Transcription by Jack Duff, @quackfluff on Twitter ] [00:00:00] [ Intro Theme begins ]
> Molly Templeton / “Artemis”: [ IC ] In the far future, faster than light travel is possible via portals called Stiffworks. Human and alien civilizations travel this way for millennia. Trade, war, and technology proliferate. Countless societies rise, thrive, fall, and vanish. Eventually, almost everyone forgets the secrets of the Stiffworks. Almost.
Three hundred years ago, the Worshipful Company of Stillfleeters is formed on Spindle, a space station of unknown origin. They send Fleeters into the void using Stiffworks in search of profit.
It is one hundred million years in the future. Welcome to Float City.
[ Intro Theme ends ]
[ Main Theme begins ]
> Mike Rugnetta / G.M. and “Zeshdano Navelle”: [ OOC ] Previously on Float City, the crew arrives on the pirate island Graffa after deciding to help Company refactor Zeshdano Navelle assure that multiple years worth of firearms shipments stay hidden. She brokered a deal with pirate king Grand Shandy, paying him to keep the guns locked up, an arrangement under threat as the continent may finally succumb to war. Whatever their personal vendettas against those who framed them for Zeshdano’s murder, the crew decides this mission is worth their time.
Shandy explains he’s inclined to keep the guns locked up, but other powerful pirates want them on the market for the sake of war profits. Shandy can get leverage over them, he explains, if the crew steals his eggs from the second most powerful political actor on the island, Théyé Draffad, who lives in a relatively secluded mansion called Sleepmonger House. They’re engaged in a tradition called “the trade”. Shandy has one of Théyé’s kin, and she has his unborn eggs. Retrieve them, and Shandy holds all the cards.
We join the team now, the morning after a day spent casing Sleepmonger House, and after Zeshdano spent several hours lost in the damp underground holes of Graffa.
[ Main Theme ends ]
> Mike / “Zeshdano”: [ OOC ] As Zeshdano rolls out of a hammock, her boots are still wet from having had to navigate all of the passageways underneath Graffa. She has not slept that much.
> Jenn de la Vega / “Merkis Imeldar”: [ OOC ] Merkis is hanging by his tail on the balcony, and he’s mumbling an entry into the stylophone, cause he hasn’t updated it in a while. And instead of the erratic squiggles of the past, you know, stylophone [laughing] self, it is now more of like a purposeful synth drone sound. And he has one word entries.
[stylophone playing a steady descending chromatic scale]
[ IC ] Pushups. Boat chase. Harpoon. Shandy. Belly armor. Reconnene- reconn- [ OOC ] And you hear the squiggly erasing sound. [stylophone squiggling] [ IC ] Recon. [stylophone clumsily concludes]
[ OOC ] And he jumps down to see if everybody’s woken up yet.
> Shannon Odell / “Beta Commbot”: [ OOC ] Yeah, Beta has woken up and she’s over by like, a water basin, and she’s kind of trying to get some of the dirt out of her nice clothes that she got at the- She doesn’t want to look like she’s been crawling around in the holes, like she has been.
> Bijan Stephen / “Remy Tester”: [ OOC ] I think Remy hears Merkis’s entry and is just like - [ IC ] [groggily] Uh, hello? Reco- Recon. We did that.
> Wythe Marschall / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Okay. At some point, a Wetan bodyguard comes to check on you, probably offers you a large heaping plate of food that none of you can eat.
[laughing]
There probably is like a kind of -
> Taylor Moore / “The Bad Boys” and “Oat”: [ IC ] I can try!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You can try, yeah. It depends how hungover you are, or how crawling through the sewers you are, but there’s a lot of weird sort of sea urchin-y eggs, with just like, gravel. And they might come back with fare that you could stomach.
And at that point, I’m sure children have just entered the room, and there’s lots of young Wetans, as usual just rifling through your stuff, and demanding, sort of stories and attention. It’s very annoying to just stay here all day because of the orphans.
> Nick Guercio / “Vynos Lysumptuara”: [ OOC ] Vynos has given a small amount of money to a child to try and find him an old sword that nobody uses. So he’s patiently waiting to see if anything will actually become of that.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Roll CHA. > Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Okay.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] This is easy. > Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] This is easy. 3.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Uh, yep, that child has not returned, and probably not gonna return.
[laughing]
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] That’s funny.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You could try another child.
[laughing]
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] There’s plenty around.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Okay, I’ll try one more child. [laughing] And then I’m going to be tired of throwing my money away on children.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] [laughing] Mark off the guilders.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] 6. I got a 6.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Great. The child returns with a child’s best impression of whatever you wanted. So it may be slightly different, but it’s more or less what you asked.
[00:05:01] > Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] What does it look like? I asked for a sword. What is it?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It’s probably like a really large knife, with some holes in it.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Okay, that’s great.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] But it’s passing scary. It could be a piratical instrument, yeah.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Okay, that’s fine, that’s fine. This is a backup plan anyway. Vynos thanks him and puts it in his cloak.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] He asks who you’re going to kill with it. > Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Oh!
[laughing]
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Vynos laughs. [ IC ] Oh, no no no, none of that will be happening. It’s really just smoke and mirrors. And he winks at the child, as if the child would understand what that means.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It also winks at you, but it has very large compound eyes, so winking means something different.
[laughing]
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Merkis is checking out that box full of fake eggs.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, you have a box of leathern Wetan egg wrappers, in which something roughly the right weight and texture has been stuffed, and they’ve been sewn
shut. So they would not pass inspection by anyone who knows what they’re looking for up close, but at a distance they look - I mean, all Wetan eggs basically look the same. Sort of like, if you had a bunch of chicken eggs, from a distance they would all look exactly the same.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] He’s got his hands out, as if he’s trying to like, measure, and trying to Tetris other things in it, and he’s just casing the thing, like - [ IC ] [mumbling] So, uh, what’s our plan today, everyone?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] I don’t know if we got that far, guys.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] We do. Here is the plan. [ OOC ] Oat unrolls a big piece of paper on the table. And on it is written: “Space for plan”, “Plan ideas.” And then underneath it is the word “House?” that’s been scratched out, and underneath has been written “House!”
[ IC ] Team! Okay, okay, so, we got a Wet Team, and a Dry Team. The Dry Team is myself, Beta, and Vynos. We will be presenting ourselves as The Alpha, Postlethwaite, and The Grey. We will be approaching the house, our arrival having already been announced, presaged, foreshadowed, last night. We will sell Beta as The Alpha, this big rich fancy merchant from far away. Parts unknown. But we can establish status easily, just leave it to me. We will then make an offer to buy Sleepmonger itself. Pending upon an immediate review and tour of its grounds and staff. This will keep Théyé occupied, while the Wet Team- [ OOC ] and then Oat gestures at Remy - [ IC ] will?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Fuck ‘em up, fuck ‘em up! Back door, right? Back door plans. Yeah. > Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] And then Oat writes “fuck ‘em up” under “House!”
[laughing]
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Secret- secretly. Secr- secret- [pause] secretly.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] Well, also grabbing the eggs. We also want to fuck up, but also grab the eggs.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. yeah.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Oh, yes! [ OOC ] “Eggs”. Oat writes “eggs”.
[laughing]
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Write that down, write that down. Don’t forget that.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Yeah, my question is, how do we bring this in surreptitiously. What if we cover the eggs with a layer, and it makes a case for the weapons that you’re bringing in.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] Well, I believe the Wet Team will be having the replacement eggs, and they’re not going to be with the Dry Team, so it’s really just, put them in the backpack when you go in, and go steal the eggs, swap ‘em out, that buys a little time perhaps-
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] But they’re-
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] -and then get out, sure as dixie. What?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] -temperature-controlled in a special container! That’s why this container’s important.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] I assume we’re just going to be swapping the eggs in and out. In and back before anything defrosts.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You should get the eggs and then move them quickly back to Shandy’s apartment building. And if you could do that very quickly, it shouldn’t be any issue. But if the eggs are not kept cool, they will just open, and become very young- they’ll become baby Wetans. You’ll have eight baby Wetans instead of eight eggs.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] [laughing] Oh, shit.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] The eggs are easier to transport, and somewhat more robust
than newborn Wetans. [laughing] So that’s really the issue here about the temperature.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] [laughing] I see.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] I’m not ready to be a father!
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Is it anything that like, the Wetans are born and the first person they see, they’re like, that is my mother, that’s my father?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Remy and Merkis!
[laughing]
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Imprinted upon...
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] I mean, they’re almost exactly as intelligent as humans, so, y’know-
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] So yes. The answer is yes.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] So yeah, that’s exactly how babies work, as I understand it,
from movies.
[laughing]
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Amazing.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Zeshdano says - [ IC ] Okay, I think what we have to do is, we will bring in the case with the fake eggs, and we’ll make the judgment call about how that gets
used, whether or not we leave with the coolerator, whether or not we leave with the eggs in a sack. I’ll bring a big bag, we’ll see what happens. I think the situation is gonna dictate.
What I think we need to know - and Team Dry, you let us know if you think this is doable - You need to tell us exactly where the eggs are stored, so that we can just waltz in, go right to the right place, pick up the eggs, and leave.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Correct.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] Beta, that might rely on you doing the brain thing again, but it
seems to have worked in the past. And I think I’ve got the hang of it now.
[00:09:54] > Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Beta says - [ IC ] You know, for a long time, everyone was like, you know, “Beta, you use your aetherspeak too often! Beta, don’t bother me while I’m sleeping by poppin’ into my head!” But now, you guys are just loving when I aetherspeak.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] The other thing is, Shandy gave you, Beta, those pills that turn people into water, or whatever, that let them sink through solid objects like it’s liquid. I - you know, when he said it, I thought like, why would I ever wanna do this to myself. But I didn’t think, what if we forced someone else to eat one?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Ah!
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] I feel like - Okay. I feel like I have been saying this forever with the brain rats. That’s just me. Maybe you haven’t been listening, I’ve been quipping about the brain rats, and I was like -
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] That is true, Remy has been talking about-
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] “Team Wet, this is what we do, we stuff one into a rat and chuck it!”
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] As Remy starts talking about brain rats again, you can see Zeshdano just completely tune out. She’s like - [ IC ] I don’t - uh... The brain rats again? I’m having a hard time thinking.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] So, Beta takes those pills out of her pocket, and she gives it to Zeshdano-
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Just- no, just give me the pills. Give me the pills. So she doesn’t, respectfully-
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] So she gives one to Zeshdano, she gives one to Remy, and then she gives a piece of gunch to Merkis, and says - [ IC ] Don’t let Remy see this.
[laughing]
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] What am I gonna do with this?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] I’m right here. I can see you saying that. I saw you do that.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] Well, Merkis wasn’t getting one, so I had to give Merkis something. > Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] I don’t need - I don’t need this. [laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] So, at this point the door opens again. [loud knocking, door latch sounds] The Wetan bodyguards don’t announce themselves, but a bunch of knocks happen, and one of them says - [ IC ] Announcing the presence of His Majesty, the Pirate King of the Dark Seas.
[ OOC ] And Grand Shandy enters with a tray of perfectly-baked normal-looking muffins. Maybe they’re a little green, because there is macro-kelp involved, or macro-algae, but it’s good. It tastes sweet, and it has a nice savory note as well. And he asks how it’s going.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Yo, big G.S.! Buddy! Thank you for putting us up, appreciate you. I think we’re good to go, pretty much. We’re gonna go do a heist. We have teams, we got team names, we’ve got everything covered. It’s just like you’d imagine a professional group of people to be. The only thing I need, I think, do you have like a, a big knife? I don’t have a - I threw my machete at somebody and it exploded, and I, you know, I would like a replacement.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Deadly right. Yes, we can be getting you a large knife of some sort or another.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Beautiful. And then, I think that’s it. I think - I mean, you guys are good to go, right?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Mhm. > Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] Yes.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Zeshdano takes one of the muffins and puts it in one of the big pockets in her poncho.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Ah, call that a roadshow. Love it. [laughing] Uh, bit disrespectful, coming from a pirate king, but luckily I’m obliging.
Right. Well, I didn’t actually come down here just to give you the muffins, as much as that would be gentlepersonly of me. I’m actually here to tell you that there’s been a Grand Convocation of the pirates called, of the Dark Seas. For tomorrow, actually.
So, if you could hurry along on the understanding that we had about what might come to pass vis á vis yourselves and unknown secret work that you might be carrying out for the Grand Shandy, that would be most wonderful, so that by tomorrow morning, all could be right vis á vis the weapons pointed at the backs, and the long metaphorical speech that we had.
You still remember, right? You didn’t get too deep in your cups last night? I heard you might
have been at Scabbards, and boy was it a time! Some of you disappeared from the bathroom, which, I mean, it happens to the best of us. [laughing]
All right, if you don’t have any other questions for me, I’ll leave you to it. Again, no thieving from the house, but yes, if you need normal things, like melee weapons, you know, if you want to borrow a child for some reason, muffins, those are basically the things I have on offer.
All right, everyone well?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Mhm!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Class.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] I think we’re good.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Yes.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] Many thanks.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] And he just leaves. Sort of as you’re answering him. > Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] May your dreams be rich with-
[laughing]
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] I like how he’s always got somewhere else to be.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] He’s busy.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] He runs the largest organization on this city, so- [laughing]
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Vynos addresses the group - [ IC ] And just a quick note: Last night we needed to sneak away from a tail, and what I did was I went to the bathroom, and I just snuck out of the bathroom, and it was fine. If we need to sneak away, just do something like that. You don’t need to get in the toilet. You don’t need to go down in the sewer. You don’t need to do anything with brain rats. You don’t need to get lost. You don’t need to swim underwater for miles. None of that’s necessary. It’s just a quick duck-out. Just how- you know, how- just like that. And just scurry away. And we’re gonna do that, all right?
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] Listen, it’s been a little while since I’ve been out in the field. I get it, I get it.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] Okay. If you - if Wet Team gets caught, remember you are security for The Alpha, and you are, maybe, perhaps checking out a bomb threat or something. And you know, Dry Team, just um - you know, go with it, have fun! You know, Alpha’s a very important person, and is probably rich enough to buy this whole island over five or six times, so act like it,
all right?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Mhm.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Yessir.
[00:14:58] > Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Are you coaching me on how to con? Okay. All right. You know what? I love it. I love your leadership, Vynos.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] Oat, I wasn’t really talking to you at all. We’ve had some problems in the past, and I just want to make sure everybody’s got their mind on their shoulders, if it will.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Oat, I think that one felt specifically aimed at Team Wet, and it’s fair. > Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] And it’s fair, and it is fair.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] All right, here we go! [ OOC ] Oat puts his hand in the middle, and says - [ IC ] Steal an egg, stop a war.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] Steal an egg, stop a war, rescuing kids!
[ all cheering ]
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] [alone] Steal an egg, stop- [pause] Oh. Yay!
[laughing]
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Yeah, stealing eggs!
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] We need to work on that as well. All right, then we’re off!
[ Ad Break Theme begins ]
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Ahoy fleeters, it’s Jenn, refactor of your heart and soul, here to check in on your current mission. How you doin’? You need some jerky?
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[ Ad Break Theme ends ]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] So, on the way there, you don’t get attacked, nothing interesting happens, other than, you hear different people, probably, you know, a lot of people in Sawpockets as you leave Shandy’s immediate zone, talking about the Convocation.
And the Convocation is among all of the gangs, but there’s the three really big ones that matter, which is Shandy’s group, the Sawpockets, Théyé’s group, the Dunecutters, who are more allied with Gaziom, and with the third group, which is, sort of has the most mutants, they’re just called the Entities. And they’re run by a Wetan named Shifty Brink Psalter. And Shifty and the Grand Shandy have serious beef going back many years. And so these three pirate lords will be gathering tomorrow, no matter what, because of the guns, and the need to make a decision about whether to move the guns or not. So it’s all up to you as to what is the outcome of that meeting.
You go up the stairs, these stairs are very, very large, and very crowded today. I assume you guys have some sort of tactical way in which you’re moving, so you’re not all together.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] We are not all together.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] No.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Dry Team is with themselves, Wet Team is with themselves. > Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Not together.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] What is the perception of the kaleidoscope painting we all have on our bodies. Like, Vynos has it on his eyes, coming all the way down, Merkis has a belly-plate - like, is that a common thing to see around?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Still?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Or is that, like, strange?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] That is a great, great question that I was waiting for someone to ask earlier, but also forgot to remind you guys: You have kaleidoscope patches. Roll REA. This is an easy REA check.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Ooh. Uh-oh. Oh, got a 5 though.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] That’s fine, it’s an easy check, you got a 5. You have been
pranked, super hard.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] [gasps]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Shandy loves prankin' bros. It goes away eventually, but the only people - you might see essentially stag parties and hen parties of people who have also kaleidogin tattoos.
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] But you don’t see other professionals in the trade who have
kaleidogin patches. At all. Merkis puts this together over a day of Graffan travel.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] So, this is the Stillfleet equivalent of someone drawing a dick and balls on our forehead while we passed out.
[laughing]
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Great, great.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] I think it’s because Merkis is looking at all the other workers, like, all the other muscle around. As he’s carrying a case, Merkis looks around and doesn’t see anyone else with kaleidoscopic tattoos. And he just kind of hunches over so his belly kinda creases over his little patch. He’s like - [ IC ] Oh. Uh, we’ve been had. [ OOC ] But doesn’t really get to communicate that to the whole group, because they’re separated.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] I’ll be clear: Oat does not have this stuff. Oat did not do it.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Also Beta, I don’t think it - We established it did not show up on
her body.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Right, no, I left it totally up to you if Shoodtha would have that. But also, if you cover it up, it’s fine, but otherwise, maybe some of the Wetan stevedores in Sawpockets giggle or ask you about your crazy night out. [laughing] But yeah, it doesn’t affect the game, really. It’s just: You got pranked.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah, Merkis just mumbles “Scabbards” any time anyone stares at him.
[00:19:41] > Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Oh, we know. [ OOC ] Okay, so, you all arrive in whatever order you want. So, in two groups, I guess, at the top of Churchymarkets.
So, you know, as you move laterally out onto the top of Graffa, you’re on Sadman Beach, you’re in the avenue sort of between the two thin strips of beach. One going north, one going south. And Sleepmonger House is basically all of the estate to your left. And, as usual, there’s a big hedge past the beach completely obscuring the house. You just see dunes, and beyond that, a rectangular, you know, long avenue-block-long hedge. And you see, you know, merchants, porters, and indeed, as before, you see little clumps of pirates.
You see maybe three kind of near Sleepmonger House, and three or four across the street kind of up the avenue the other way. What do you guys do?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Dry Team is gonna approach the front door of Sleepmonger. > Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Great.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] And I think, Wet Team, we’re gonna hang back for a sec. > Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Mhm.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Mhm.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Probably not as a group, and maybe just kinda trying to blend
in, like across the street, gonna wait for the phone call to come in as it were.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Great. You approach. You see those three pirates, we’ll say all humans this time. And if you were - I think you were here yesterday, right? You made an impression, so I think they would notice you, and they might kind of go over to the guards at the front gate of the house, which includes one of the Fex. And the Fex looks at the humans, and they chat briefly, and then the Fex actually comes up to you, and sort of asks who you are. You know. Tell me about how you approach, is it very obvious who the leader is here, or?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Well, first of all, can I have a conversation as we approach with Beta and Vynos?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Of course.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] All right. So, we’re about to turn the corner and like, be on stage, as it were. And I say - [ IC ] Vynos, now, tell me, what is the most visually exciting thing you can do with the hell science stuff?
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] Ah, well, I could turn myself purple and grow strange writhing skin, and have my hair stick up and become all electrified.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Oh, this is great! Why don’t you do that more?
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] I did it once to try to scare someone, but I still had to shoot him in the
face.
[laughing]
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Yeah, all right, well, keep it on deck, we might need it. Now, Beta,
we’re gonna do the old- [pause] what I call- [pause] > Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] [enthusiastic] Yes.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] [laughing] Gimme a planet name, Wythe. What’s a planet name that hasn’t been in the show yet?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Kalayat.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] This is called the Kalayat Shuffle. Now, you’re gonna pretend that you
don’t speak Common, and that I’m translating for you. Right? That’s the game we’re doing? > Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] Yes.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] All right, fantastic.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] I’m speaking Late Tephnian.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Oh, perfect.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] Just in case, you know, one of these guards speaks Late Tephnian.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] I’m taking a note, and will envelop it and enfold it into the con. I love this! It’s so rare that I feel like I’m in a place of competence and expertise. And this is a really great break. All right, all right. Now: Beta, is the brain thing ready to go, where we all talk to each other’s heads?
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Beta answers in Oat’s head: [ IC ] [echoing] Yes! > Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] I love it! Okay, steal an egg, win a war, let’s do it!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, you approach. The Fex is walking toward you, as you’re walking toward him, unless you stop.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] No, we - So, this is the way we’re approaching. Alpha is in the back, Postlethwaite and The Grey are up front.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] And I rolled, so the person on duty at the front door today is the guard who was on duty outside yesterday, who is extremely aggressive, and immediately is just loudly yelling - [ IC ] What’s up new people?
[laughing]
[ OOC ] And he pulls from his back a solid gold machete that is as long as he is -
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Oh, god!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] And just kind of waves it, lazily, at you. And says - [ IC ] Who comes to Sleepmonger House as though you are on the list? And you are not on the list.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Oh, I hate him already.
[laughing]
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] No, I love this guy. This is great. He’s a dumbass. Machete of gold?
That shit’s gonna bend so fast.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Yeah, the worst metal to make a machete out of. I guess, like, gallium would be worse.
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] So soft! He also has a modern, like, assault rifle strapped to his
back. He’s definitely better armed than any of the-
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] [exaggerated] A rifle for salt!? This guys an idiot!
[laughing]
That’s gonna scan great in the show.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It’s gonna be great.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Should we explain the joke?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Uh, yes. We’ll do a Fun Chatty about the joke.
[laughing]
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Do a Fun Chatty about it, yeah.
[laughing]
“So, what Taylor meant...”
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] I am Postlethwaite, and I am representing The Alpha. We seek to parlay with Théyé now.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] And you’re not on the list. And we heard about you yesterday. Because it says someone named The Alpha might come to our door. Why should I let you in?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] This is the only time we will be visiting Graffa. Should you not speak with us now, you will never receive this meeting again.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] He is looking at the group with the eyes of someone whose job it is to make security decisions. And he does this all the time. Roll CHA, and he’s going to contest that, and try to tell if you’re lying, basically.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] I did not do well. Uh - a 5.
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Uh - he got an 8. He does not believe anything Oat’s saying.
And actually does slip the machete back into its holster, and looks a little more professional now. He’s not going to attack you with an ornamental weapon.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Mhm.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] He asks - [ IC ] What is your business here, man? Like, why are you coming around Sleepmonger House two days in a row? That’s super suspicious. Twice as suspicious as a single day.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] When this is happening, Alpha - Beta as Alpha - says a couple words to Oat in Late Tephnian, kind of acting like she’s confused.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, this guy does not know Late Tephnian, very clearly.
[00:24:46] > Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] And I sort of look surprised. [ IC ] Uh, yes. [clears throat] Yes, uh - yes, madam. [ OOC ] And I look back to the guard and I say - [ IC ] My mistress has given me permission to explain to you that we seek to make an offer on Sleepmonger. But this offer will only come once.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] On what? Offer on what? > Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Sleepmonger. The manor.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] He looks back at this avenue-block-long estate, and looks back at you, the three of you, and says nothing. He just starts laughing. And then says - [ IC ] You’re telling me you’re gonna buy the whole thing? All of this? With money?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] No, not with money. With trade. But for anything more than that, we’ll need to speak to Théyé directly. Please. We certainly don’t mind waiting for - [ OOC ] and I turn back to Beta - [ IC ] Would you say, a few minutes? [ OOC ] And I say something in like, a gobbledygook language.
[laughing]
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Yeah, Beta looks down at her nails - even though she doesn’t
have any nails - and kind of looks to the side and says something back in Late Tephnian.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] We understand that this is not orthodox, and so we are prepared to wait
for [pause] six and a half minutes.
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Okay.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] What is the nonsense that Beta is saying? Like, I’m just curious if I did understand Late Tephnian, is she like - ?
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] She’s saying - [ IC ] Oh my gosh, I am so excited. I can’t believe
we’re really doing this.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] She’s like, “This house is so cheugy”? Is that the - ?
[laughing]
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Cut that, please. That’s not gonna age well. No one’s gonna know what it means in a month.
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Got it, got it. My bad.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] No, how about you bleep it? > Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] No, do it, keep it in!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] So - he leaves. This is - yesterday - his name is Shriyal. Shriyal leaves, and is gonna go confer with his boss. There’s an uncomfortable amount of time that passes, because actually waiting six and a half minutes with no information would feel really weird.
And then, right at about the six and half minute mark, a different Fex comes towards you. This Fex is a little older, and one of his legs looks like he lost it, it’s been replaced with actually Wetan - a young Wetan limb. And he immediately, as soon as he sees Oat, if Oat’s Wetan arm is not disguised-
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] It is not.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] -has a brief sort of nod of recognition. And he sort of walks forward and again is looking you all up and down very thoroughly. And then introduces himself as Fresheyen Yen Freshenalalen. And says -
[ IC ] I am the chancellor of Sleepmonger House. It is my job to keep my master’s schedule. And she is quite busy, as you can imagine. I’m told by my colleague you have very serious business. And yet, we don’t know who you are. We’ve heard some rumors. We know you were here yesterday, for some reason, but you didn’t come in or anything. And you’re not on the list.
Maybe you could come inside and we could chat very briefly about what it is you want. Of course, we will have to check you. We have certain security protocols. You can understand, I’m sure.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Of course. This is all amenable to us.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Great. [ OOC ] And he takes out a little fish-shaped whistle, and whistle. It’s a very annoying tinny sound. [high metallic whistle] And a number of what appear to be very large skunks [animal grunts] just kind of rush out from the estate grounds, and begin circling you and sniffing you, sort of link guard dogs.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Mhm...
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] If you guys have weapons that aren’t like, very complex archaetech, they find all of the weapons, and they want all of the weapons to be given to his colleague, who comes back, the sort of hot-heated Fex with the machete. Who basically puts them in a bag. Or, you know, depending on how many there are, how awkward that is...
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Oat doesn’t have anything. Would they recognize the Ylythnari visor as a weapon?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] No, no. These are skunks. They have no idea what that is. [laughing]
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Okay. So they wouldn’t recognize the Ylythnari visor, the visage is my shield, the - what about the two-sided dart where you can see through someone’s eyes?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] The dart probably looks enough like a dart that the Fex would want to take that.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Cool. And not the fishbowl, probably? No.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It looks like a fishbowl with a Gameboy inside? [laughing]
No, I guess not. They’re - if that’s - they might ask what it is?
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] And then - They ask what it is, and Alpha just speaks to them in Late Tephnian as if they would know.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] That is great. I’m gonna roll a thing very briefly. [laughs] The person - the leader, Fresheyen, says basically, like, “Cómo está? Donde es la baño?” in Late Tephnian.
[laughing]
He seems to have picked up random Late Tephnian words, but not-
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Oh, shit.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] He’s been doing his Duolingo.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah. So, I don’t know what you said to him, but he sort of understood.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Yeah. She said - what was the question that she was asked? Oh- > Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] You basically described what it was.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Yeah, I described what the piece of equipment was.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah. Then you get to keep everything except the dart. The dart they will - Shriyal takes for safe-keeping, on his person. And then he says - [ IC ] Follow me. [ OOC ] And leads you on the long straight path toward the front entrance of the house.
[00:29:47] > Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Vynos has two guns with him that he gives up, and puts in the bag, but he does have that sword, the holey - the sword with literal holes in it - the holey sword. So, he does say [ IC ] I would ask only that you follow me with this, as it is a gift for Théyé.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] This sword right here?
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] Yes.
[pause]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Sure. You can keep that, if you’d like, on you, if you are giving it and not acting in a hostile manner. I will trust you.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] Thank you.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] He asked your names, he’s cordial, he’s very polite. But he
does say normal, nice stuff as you’re walking toward the house.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Oh, of course. You may call me Postlethwaite. I am the Attaché of the Moss Ascendency to their Mistress, the Alpha, and her Communications Demiurge. This is her Grand Vizier, The Grey. And of course, it is my utmost pleasure, and your utmost honor, to hereby witness the Empress of Export, the White Whale of Wholesale, Chair of the Gnarcossan Hyper-Chamber of the All-Encompassing Commerce, Alpha.
[ chimes ]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] We are honored by your presence, persons with very long job
titles.
[laughing]
I am Fresheyen Yen Freshenalalen, the leader of the drill team. There are several of us, you’ll see us about the house. We are mercenaries in the employ of Mistress Théyé. She is a very powerful politician, banker in this city. I presume you know that, or you wouldn’t be here.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] We’re well aware. That’s correct.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Good. [ OOC ] When you enter the house, the front doors are very large, very heavy, [ heavy doors clatter open ] and to either side, there’s the thick windows.
[ gentle swelling string music ]
And it looks, because the windows are this medieval glass, you kind of can’t tell how beautiful it is inside. Inside is very light. You’re in this concourse between the two wings of the house. So, the whole top is glass. And at the other end are similar, very large heavy doors, which are actually open onto the beach right now. And there’s a couple of other Fex guards, you know, smoking cigarettes and chatting. And they sort of straighten up when they see Fresheyen, Fresheyen Yen Freshenalalen, approach. And you can see there’s a door on the left, a door on the right, that go into the north and south wings of the house. There’s beautiful tile on the floor, and it’s pretty spare in design but there are some creeping plants going up the sides of this outer sort of concourse area. This between zone.
And he leads you into the south wing of the house, so, to your right. And that opens onto just like, a very sunny room, with a low false-walled-off kitchen area. And there’s no one in here right now, but you see one more guard, sort of in the central area where essentially there’s more doors beyond. Cause there’s somebody at like, the back of this very large sort of central great room. And there’s some low couches about. A couple chairs, you know. Like, bar sort of stools. There’s not that much stuff in here, everything is very very nice. It’s immaculately clean. It doesn’t look like someone has a lot of social life going on in the house.
He does not ask you to sit. He immediately cuts down to business, and says, you know - [ IC ] Who are you really? What do you really want? We saw you around yesterday, we’re extremely suspicious, and you just told my colleague that you somehow could buy Sleepmonger House. [ OOC ] And he seems to not really believe you, but he’s at least willing to play along. You’ve gotten this far.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] I did not tell your colleague that we were able to buy Sleepmonger House. I said we would trade for it. Any more details will be dealt with directly with Théyé. If coming around yesterday made you uncomfortable, or caused any suspicion on our part, that’s of course an apology from me, forthcoming now. I am sorry for that. But I’m sure that you understand that we have supreme security concerns, not only due to The Alpha’s status, and the nature of our business, but of course, in environs such as these. No offense intended, of course.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] No offense taken. I would expect nothing less. And of course it makes sense that you would want to view the exterior, although there’s not much to view, before you entered inside.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Thank goodness.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] You can see, it’s very well-built. It’s very beautiful. And it’s- > Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] It is! It’s a wonderful place.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Vynos is looking around, inspecting things as though there’s a hidden list of maybe a thousand requirements for this building that they privately have, and Vynos is astutely checking to see that they will fit all of the exacting specifications.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, I would say, if you wanna roll to perceive, I might tell
you a little more, depending on how good you are at sort of not giving yourself away in a guarded situation. Also, yeah, Fresheyen definitely seems like he’s still trying to gauge whether he should bother Théyé with meeting with you guys. You would just sort of understand that from what’s going on here.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] This is mostly for show, but it would still be interesting if you could - if my perception could get me anything. I rolled a 5.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, you see what I described, you might notice that almost definitely there’s at least one bedroom beyond the back of this wing of the house. So, you’re not sure about the other wing, and you’re not sure about other rooms, but you’re in a kind of great room/kitchen/sitting room area, and beyond are some bedrooms. And the other Fex guard here seems - all of the other Fex except Shriyal seem more sort of subservient to Fresheyen, they sort of do whatever he says immediately.
[00:34:32] > Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] I understand that this is, as I said, unorthodox. In many of our business dealings, we often may schedule things years or entire solar cycles in advance. It’s understandable. However, there come a time, and there come events in all of our lives, which demand [pause] a certain flexibility. Matters of great import and value are times and events such as these. I would appreciate if you were to give this opportunity the respect I believe in hindsight you will feel it deserves.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] I see. You would call this a meta-orthodox situation.
[ OOC ] And then he laughs. As if he’s made a very funny joke.
[laughing]
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Yeah, and Oat cracks. Oat, you know, like - or, Oat pretends to crack, as if - and he laughs, as well. [ IC ] [laughing] Yes.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] [laughing]
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] I think, I think, uh - Should your master make the specifics of this
situation clear to you, I think we would all agree it is far above and beyond the orthodox, yes.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Great. Well, if you could maybe tell me a little bit more about what possible realm of trade you could envision being worth the largest piece of property, arguably, on Graffa, besides maybe the impenetrable red steel tower of the Late Tephnians, it would help me even understand what world we’re sitting in in terms of negotiation.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] No.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Are you talking about, um - No? Just no? > Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] It’s no.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Understood.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Any further details we’ll need to speak with Théyé directly. I mean, you understand that for security reasons...
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] He nods at you, and turns to Alpha/Beta, and says, like, “Sí. La bibliotheca.” And just disappears down the hall.
[laughing]
Because, yeah, now he’s gonna kick this up the chain of command. So you’re left alone with one guard in the room, and another guard outside in the concourse. And other than that, you haven’t seen anyone. It’s bright, it’s still late morning.
Do we wanna cut to - this is Dry Team, right? Do you wanna cut to Wet Team?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] I still can’t believe we went with “dry” and “wet”.
[laughing]
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] How many guards are there outside Sleepmonger House now that Dry Team has entered?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] So there’s three humans who are not really specifically doing much, they’re just on the street. And that’s it. And then inside the hedges, I don’t know if Wet Team was able to observe Dry Team, but you would have seen two Fex and four giant skunks, and they all went towards the house. And that’s it, it doesn’t - it’s not like a lot of dudes, yeah.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Maybe like, you know, Zeshdano sidles up next to Remy as they’re both pretending to look at something in like a shop stall. And is like - [ IC ] Didn’t like the look of those - [ OOC ] Would we know what those animals were?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, Zeshdano’s lived on Kakudun, they’re Kakudunais insert-MacGuffin-name-here. [laughing] Yeah, they’re giant skunks.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Giant skunks. Yeah, okay.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] They’re basically large xeno-mustelids that are, you know, cranky forest creatures. These have been trained, they have great sniffers, and they can ferret out - they’ve been trained to specifically detect common weapons. So, things like swords, hatchets, pistols, bombs, shotguns.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] They probably wouldn’t know, like, what a laser is. Although
they might get it cause it’s gun-shaped.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Gun-shaped, right.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] They definitely wouldn’t find like, a single poison thing that doesn’t look like a weapon. They look like they could fight you pretty bad - I mean, you know, they have big claws.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Yeah. So, Zeshdano explains this to Remy, and if Merkis is nearby, Merkis, like under her breath, like - [ IC ] Ugh, gotta be careful about not having anything that they’re gonna sniff out. If we’re going that way. I guess we don’t know exactly how we’re getting yet, huh?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] I think we go in through the back. I think, you know, maybe we just make a little hole. Maybe we make a little hole in the wall. And we just sneak right in.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Zeshdano looks at Merkis and says like - [ IC ] Uh... I mean, Banshee: do you have any guesses? I mean, you’re good at getting into things, right?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Mhm... [ OOC ] And he’s standing sentry with the case of fake eggs and pretending not to acknowledge Zeshdano. But he’s eying the hedges for any weakness, for any manhole-y type situation. If there’s like, a freight entrance of some sort, like something like that. He basically uses “Find Nemat”, which is burning 3 GRT, and making a reason check. So, let’s do that. Got a 10.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Nice. Yeah, there’s no freight entrance. There’s the front entrance where everything comes, and the back entrance, which is pretty much symmetric, because the house kind of ends on the - the hedge is right front of it, and then the beach. But they’re both heavy iron gates that can be closed. They’re open a lot of the time. And then the doors are very heavy of the house.
However, you do Find Nemat essentially: you find that there is a manhole cover nearby, and based on your electrical sense you can feel that - a normal sewer, you would not feel really electrical charge, it’s just sewer. And it’s badly-made sewer, because they can’t dig very deep, or they hit, you know, a cenote and fall or whatever. Something bad happens. They hit unexploded ordnance from a war a thousand years ago, who knows.
In this case, you feel an electrical sense. You feel there is a tunnel constructed to be some sort of, you’re guessing, escape route? But essentially, there is a manhole cover in the street. It is in the middle of the avenue, so there’s people around. But if you get down there, it will lead you, you think, right into the heart. It feels like it’s going dead toward Sleepmonger House. The underneath of - yeah.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah. Merkis looks around, scanning the street, and sort of - he’s making kind of a homing noise. Like - [ IC ] [humming, gradually increasing in pitch] And then he spots the manhole. [ IC ] Oh, we’ve got a problem. I see this hole over here, but it’s in daylight, and there are tons of eyes here.
[00:39:51] > Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Oh, I got it. Don’t worry about it. Just let me know when we need to go.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Don’t worry about it?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] I got it.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] What do you mean?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] I got it, don’t worry about it. > Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Okay, well that’s our door.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah, as soon as Remy - [ IC ] I feel - should we wait for the signal from Beta, or should we just get down there and see what happens? Let’s get down there! Let’s see what happens!
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] Let’s - let’s wait for the signal.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] I guess, I mean - you’re the boss, Zesh, I mean-
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] I mean, it’s hard to make a decision, because you’re being very mysterious about a thing that you’re claiming will help, so...
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] I’m gonna tell- just don’t worry about it. I’m gonna do the thing, and it will be fine.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] Okay. Cause it-
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Is it like the Emissary helping again?
[laughing]
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] No, it’s - that was only one time, okay?
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] Yeah, cause if that’s gonna happen again, I would politely request- > Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] That was not help, that was not help.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] I mean, as I recall, the Emissary did murder a few of our enemies, so- > Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] That’s true.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] -you know, it wasn’t all bad.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] And Zeshdano says - [ IC ] Well, if we need a Plan B, it turns out that the best way to hide if you need to do something that is a little suspicious is to just not be suspicious about it. And if we have to go into a hole in the ground, we’ll just tell everybody we should be allowed to go in the hole. It won’t be a problem. Don’t worry. I feel like we can talk our way out of this.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Shall we Plan A, then? Shall I Plan A then?
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] Yes, you - I’m so curious to see what it is that you have in your sleeve.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Ah.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Are we doing it now, or waiting?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Yeah, we’re doing it now. Cause we don’t know what’s down there! We should figure it out, right?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Okay Remy...
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] So, Remy’s gonna pick up a pebble -
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Oh, shit! [laughing]
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] I assume the streets are cobblestoned, right?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, there’s - I mean, there’s sandy - Yeah, you find a pebble or a little piece of shell somewhere.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Great. And he’s gonna look around the street. Are there any stores or anything that are heavily trafficked?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It’s not very - There’s not a lot of heavy traffic here, it’s kind of a weird part of town.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Mhm.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] But there’s definitely like, porters going back and forth all of the time bringing stuff up to the upper part of the island. And there are some stores in front of you. There’s definitely some sort of high-end shops. Maybe there’s like, a lunch spot with a good dozen people or something in it.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Perfect. Does the lunch spot have a sign? > Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Uh, sure, yeah.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] So, Remy is going to use “Charge”, and flick the shell as close to that sign as possible.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Okay, so you wanna blow up the sign, is that correct? > Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yes.
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Uh, great. The sign says “Puddlestruck”, and it basically describes a special on a kind of île flottante, but with like a live tarantula inside that then you have to chase down and eat, and that’s something the rich people here love to do. It’s considered extremely cheugie.
[laughing]
And you destroy that sign.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah. Yeah, I think- yeah. He’s gonna aim for like, just below it, so it falls. Like, there’s an explosion, and it falls and, you know, dust and noise...
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Great, so there’s this long copy sign in like, scroll- like, looping beautiful Kakudunais handwriting, and it just tilts over and falls. How loud is the explosion? Is the idea to get everyone’s attention who’s dining inside?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yes.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Okay.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah, so I should burn - I’m just gonna burn 1 GRT. Just - whatever. [laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] There’s definitely at least three guards that are gonna try to notice that you just threw a pebble that blew up that sign. So, I don’t know if you’re trying to be sneaky, or like, are you trying to hide?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] I think he’s trying to be sneaky about it, you know, like, hand by his side, just kinda flicking as far as he can. Aiming for the sign. Eh, I don’t know if he hits it, I haven’t rolled for it, but he’s gonna hit something and it’s gonna explode.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Sure. Oh, that’s actually a good point. I was gonna give you the hitting a sign, cause it’s not a - but, yeah, roll to hit like, near where you want it.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] See, I shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have fucking told you. [laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Just get a 5 or higher in COM - you’re just flicking a thing at a thing, yeah.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] 6.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You hit just below the sign, where you wanted, and I would say now you should roll movement to sneak, because there are guards paid to literally look out for suspicious stuff like people throwing explosions.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah, I don’t -
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Oof. All three of us.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] But, it’s not a throw so much as it is a flick, but I get it. Should I
burn some GRT? Nah, let’s freeball it. 9.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Wow, all right. [laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Uh-
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] “Freeball it.”
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Freeball on the 9!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] The first pirate rolled a natural 1, so he was actually at the crescendo of a really big story, and is extremely annoyed and freaked out when the explosion happens.
[ sound of charging followed by small explosion, people screaming ]
And sort of spills his coffee on his buddies, and now none of them are looking at you, they’re all running toward the explosion, they’re just cleaning stuff off their doublets.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah. I assume - I feel like the sign probably is like hanging and then it falls, and then it’s - people are just “Ah! What the hell!” You know, running away from it, or toward.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, someone runs out and - yeah. Someone immediately runs out and says - [ IC ] My sign! It took me so long to write that sign by hand!
[laughing]
If only there was a shop that printed them!
[ OOC ] Yeah, there’s people running out, they’re all worried about the sign. No one saw you, so you’ve created a distraction, the guards are not looking at you, for at least a minute.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Can we say, yeah, Zeshdano has positioned herself over the manhole cover, and as soon as the distraction is made, like - “whoop!”, sort of tries to pull up the cover?
[ sounds of manhole scraping open ]
[00:44:55] > Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You guys yank it up and disappear into the darkness?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yes.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Okay.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Merkis’s tail, flipping in.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] I told you I got it.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Manhole cover closing noise. [ clatter of manhole cover closing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You’re alone in the darkness. It’s not very deep, you go down about five feet, and you’re just in a tunnel. It’s pretty cramped, it’s like just - you know, maybe Merkis can stand up, basically, but the rest of you are kind of bent over. And it’s just collecting water and moving it around in such a way so that all the water from the top of the city doesn’t just spray randomly on people on the cliffs, or down into the Escape, but actually moves somewhere else. So it sort of takes it toward the edge, and then, like, down. So you can see what the actual sewer is doing.
The tunnel you want is like, perpendicular to that, and clearly just goes into darkness, but beneath Sleepmonger House. You can’t really see where it goes from here.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Merkis cracks a torch from the adventurer’s pack. I think it’s like, kind of probably a glowstick-y situation?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, it’s like dinoflagellates that makes it.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah. And he does a little shaky-shake, and cracks it. [snapping
noise] Now you can see a little bit.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Nice. Yeah, you can see it goes down a ways towards Sleepmonger House. Cause it’s like a whole avenue block, so, you’re on one end of it, and it looks like it goes for a long part of that. Just, it’s a concrete tunnel, basically.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Okay. Merkis leads the way down that tunnel. [ splashing, fades ]
[ gentle string chamber music fades in ]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] After not an awkwardly long amount of time, probably just a minute, Fresheyen comes back, and behind him is a middle-aged human woman with not extravagant clothes. Like, a green dress, some practical - you know, she’s got like, a bandolier with a couple guns, but not, you know, again, armed to the teeth or anything, not as much as the Sawpockets pirates. Her hair is braided, and has lots of gold rings in it, but nothing super
over-the-top. She’s not wearing, like, crown jewels.
And she looks at the three of you for a second, and sort of tries to understand, like, “Why did I allow my chancellor to bring these people into my living room?” And then, you can see her just decide to go with it, and ask - [ IC ] Who are you? And why are you in my house?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Théyé. It is a pleasure to finally meet you. > Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Vynos does a big bow.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] May we speak freely here?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Please.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] And, I understand that this might cause some offense, and I promise you there’s no offense intended, this is simply due diligence on our part: your chancellor, we can trust him with details?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Yes. You should assume that he and I are on the same team. I don’t really know who you are? He told me you’re some rich people from somewhere else, and you have a proposition for me. So... I make money, I’m here to make money, I’m listening to your proposition. You have five minutes.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Normally we would do quite a thorough security review, but of course, out of deference to this being your domain, we are forgoing that diligence. Although I can say, it is relaxing to hear your assurances.
[ OOC ] And Oat sort of visibly lets himself relax, to make Théyé feel that know she is trusted and things are a bit more normal.
[ IC ] You may call me Postlethwaite. I am the Attaché to the Moss Ascendancy, and from the Moss Ascendancy to my employer, as well as her Communications Demiurge. This is The Grey, her Grand Vizier. And now it is my pleasure, and your infinite honor, to be presented [laughter from others throughout] The Empress of Export, the White Whale of Wholesale, and the Chair of Gnarcosan Hyper-Chamber of All-Encompassing Commerce, my mistress, Alpha.
[chimes, again]
[ OOC ] And Oat deeply bows. And in the brain-speak, he telepathies to Vynos - [ IC ]
[echoing] [urgently] Bow, bow!
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Vynos is bowing as well, very deeply.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Beta takes a step forward, puts her hand out to Théyé, and says, in Late Tephnian - [ IC ] Théyé, it is such a pleasure to meet you, finally.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] She extends her arm, and grasps your arm in whatever way seems natural. [laughing] If you were obviously going for some sort of handshake. And she says
- [ IC ] Look, I don’t know who you are, but I should just tell you, I don’t speak Late Tephnian. I do have- [pause] It doesn’t matter. I don’t speak Late Tephnian. If you don’t know Gazionne, then your language is fine. Spin is fine.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] As her Communications Demiurge, I’ll be translating for Alpha. > Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] I see. Well, it’s nice to meet her. What does she want?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Oh, what does she want? She wants many things. But, specifically, today, to you, this is what we have to say. For a lifetime, some would say - the rumors would say - many lifetimes, my employer has operated at the bleeding edge avant-garde of commercial and business theory and practice. Some would even say that the imports, exports, the very balance sheets themselves are made into a kind of post-modern, modern, post-modern art. Even deals themselves become aesthetic objects.
And yet, know, because of her desires, we find ourselves in a period of change. Alpha desires to - [ OOC ] And I turn back to her, and I say - I sort of look to her questioningly, and I say with my brain - [ IC ] [echoing] Give me permission to say it.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Beta says in Late Tephnian - [ IC ] Go ahead, go ahead.
[00:49:55] > Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] All right, and then I say with my brain - [ IC ] [ echoing ] Touch your hand to your tummy. [ OOC ] And then I look back at Théyé and I say - [ IC ] Alpha seeks to settle down. She has decided to reproduce.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] I see. Congratulations? I guess, y’all? Uh... Should we get some sort of festive... How do you reproduce, if you don’t mind my asking, I’m just not as familiar.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Well, the details of that are both extremely personal, complicated, and irrelevant to our business today.
[laughing]
The long and short of it is this. After an extensive survey, we have determined that this incredible place that you have built - and congratulations and our compliments from all of us today on this wonderful place you have made. We have determined that Sleepmonger is the ideal residence for Alpha to assume. However, we also understand, of course, that this is a trade of incredible value. And so we come today offering what we believe to be an extremely generous trade.
[ OOC ] And I look back to Alpha again, for permission to go on? I try to make it seem like I’m nervous, like saying this next part - [inhales] it’s - I, I, it’s almost too big for me to even say on my own, give me permission Alpha!
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Beta’s feeling really confident right now, and like, feeling very powerful -
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Sell it girl!
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] So, she puts her hand on her mouth, and gives a little kiss, and blows a kiss towards Oat.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Oat acts like this is the best thing that’s ever happened to him, but he’s trying to look like he’s trying to keep it down a little bit, trying to repress it a little bit. And like - this is like, when the used car salesman is like, “Let me go ask my boss if we can go cut this deal.” [laughing] And then he leaves, and then he comes back and is like, “Wow! He really likes you! We’re willing to...” [laughing]
All right, so Oat says - [ IC ] We have recently come into possession, or one might say, exclusive access, to a fully-functioning Late Tephnian hulk orbiting a small ice planet in what we believe to be an unmapped system. We are willing to trade you that vessel plus a lifetime contract of servitude from our banshee, The Grey. [ OOC ] And I brainwave to Vynos, and I say - [ IC ] [echoing] It’s showtime!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Théyé is extremely confused.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Vynos starts to move his arms slowly. And he - as he’s doing this, like, he’s kind of doing this to buy just a second of time, just to be like - [ IC ] [echoing] Do you mean, you want me to “Call Weird” now? To turn blue?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] [echoing] Yes, yes! Get weird! Be powerful!
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] [echoing] Okay. [ OOC ] And Vynos extends his arms upward, and
then goes - [ IC ] [booming, echoing, theatrical voice] My power is yooooooouuuuurs! [laughing]
[ intense droning, gradually increasing in volume and intensity ]
[ OOC ] And then he Calls Weird. When Vynos Calls Weird, as one does in the Hell Sciences, he begins, first, writhing. His skin begins writhing. And then he starts changing color, and there’s just kind of streaks of blues and purples that kind of run through the writhes, until it becomes more blue and purple. And then his hair slowly starts lifting as though he’s holding onto one of those electric balls that makes your hair lift. And electricity starts running between the strands of hair. His eyes turn white. He has almost like, this static around him, you can feel this change, even if you couldn’t see him, you could feel it. And he becomes just basically kind of a writhing blue, purple man.
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Sick. So, two things happen in immediate response, which is one, Fresheyen whips out his rifle, and is pointing it at you. And he also lowers the mask of his sort of helmet, that he wasn’t really wearing, which is basically an entire horse skull fitted over his little head. So he’s got a horse skull mask, and he’s pointing this rifle right at Vynos.
And Théyé herself just backs up and taps a little copper bracer, a little copper bracelet, and she
just instantly appears to be about three meters to her left, in a way that is completely physically impossible. Like, you’re looking at her, and then one second she’s like, in another locus. And they both seem honestly a little frightened.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Good.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] But also just unclear as to what is going on? [laughing]
[00:54:06] > Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] And then Oat says - [ IC ] Please, relax. This is not a threat. In fact, quite the opposite. We believe this could be quite a boon for both you and your operations.
Our proposition is this. In exchange for the services of The Grey and access to the fully-functioning Late Tephnian hulk, including its own active Stiffworks, we would like both its grounds, its structures, and potentially its staff, pending an in-person review.
Now, what we would position as next steps are these. Today we would like for you to give us a tour of these grounds, particularly a review of the staff, and also the top priority, as much as you are willing to share, some sort of visual assessment of its secure holding facilities. As you can imagine this is of utmost importance to any abode The Alpha might assume.
Then, should we find, as our surveys suggest, Sleepmonger is in fact a good fit for us, we will then invite you to tour the aforementioned hulk. And if you find it amenable, we will of course go on with the trade.
[ OOC ] I wanna roll “Con”.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] I was gonna say, you gotta roll CHA or use “Con” at this
point.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Cause this is a bold- > Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] I’m using “Con”.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] This is a big lie.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Bold lie, yeah.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Get it, Oat! Get it, Oat! > Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Do it.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] All right, for- God, I love Con. All right, I’m using my Con power. This is the text: “This is not a Weird power, and won’t work forever if the lie is unreasonable or
can be disproved, but it will allow you to fool anyone briefly. Con: Tell a lie, everyone believes it, no check required.”
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Great, and so the lie is, this hulk exists.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] We have a fully-functioning Tephnian hulk, and we are willing to trade it, along with our magic slave [laughing] for your house, as long as you give us a tour of the secure facilities and a staff review today.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Okay, I’ll allow it. I mean, it is ultra-ridiculous, and there are other powers that could call this into question, but for the moment, I think Con is a good play here, and she is at least curious enough to sort of learn the truth about this hulk, perhaps.
She sort of chuckles and taps the copper bracelet again and is standing right in front of you again, not displaced. [warp sound] And Fresheyen leaves the mask on, and sort of keeps the rifle out, but lowers it a little so he’s not pointing it at, you know, Super Saiyan Vynos. And she looks at her head guard, and he looks at her, and she says -
[ IC ] [laughing] Listen, y’all, I don’t know what to say to this offer. But if you’d like a quick tour of the mansion, I suppose we could do that, and maybe get to know one another. I don’t really know where you’re from, for one. And what business you’re in that is so - it sounds extremely lucrative, for another.
So maybe we could discuss some of these matters, and you could see some of the rooms. It is a fine house. I’m not sure why you think this is - if you’re that powerful of a figure, why it would be worth an entire starship, but sure, let’s take a walk. Does that sound amenable?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Oat looks to Beta?
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Beta takes a moment and she motions for Théyé to come closer to
her.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] She desires your presence.
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] I’m right here.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] No. More.
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Okay, yeah, she comes closer.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] All silently, Beta kind of like, is kind of miming what she wants to say, and she kind of puts up a finger, like, “One moment.” And then ruffles through her bag and pulls out just the top of My Visage Is My Shield. And shows it and points into the direction of Théyé, and kind of with this inquiring, kind of like, big eyes face, like, “Look at this!”
[chimes]
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] She wants you to- [pause] look at it!
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] I understood that, but thank you Demiurge. [laughing]
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Of course.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] It’s nice! [ OOC ] So, basically, it’s like if you had in a bag somehow folded up metal like, Basquiat or Picasso that you just kind of showed the top of. Like, out of your bookbag?
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Yeah, yeah.
[laughing]
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Like pulling up your shirt to show a gun.
[laughing]
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Yeah. “Look at this!”
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Roll CHA.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Oh boy. I’m gonna burn 3 GRT, because my roll for CHA is a 4. So I’m gonna burn 6 GRT, and - 4 plus 6, so I rolled 10.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] That’s great, yeah. She looks in your bag. You have an oversized bag, I guess, in which you have this ancient futuristic military weapon, that is also a beautiful piece of art. Not weapon, sorry, ancient military shield, that is also a beautiful piece of art.
She looks in, and you can see her face change, and this is maybe the first time in the conversation where she really believes. So she’s not just playing along because you’re weird and you don’t seem that threatening based on her guards’ assessment and her own experience, but she’s very curious about this object, and this object seems to prove more than a lot of the talking and what you’ve done so far. Also I guess Vynos becoming Weird is something genuinely very surprising to her.
So she asks you about it, immediately. She starts talking, realizes you don’t understand her, and she turns back to the Demiurge and starts asking about it while sort of gesturing that Fresheyen should sort of lead the way through the rest of this wing, and just sort of meander through some rooms.
So if you want, you’re on a tour - room by room, of at least some of the major rooms, you’re not sure she’s showing you everything, but - of Sleepmonger House. And there’s always a couple guards.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Of course, of course.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] There’s a guard with you, there’s always another guard, like,
down the hall.
[01:00:00] [ string music fades ] [ sloshing liquid ]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You’re in a sewer leading directly beneath Sleepmonger House. You move forward, you move forward, you move forward. There’s a grate in the way. And you can see just beyond that, the space opens up, and is a low rectangular room. It’s just one big room, like a basement. And it seems to be filled with stuff? Just looks like ordinary barrels, like, metal barrels. There’s not that much near you. But it looks like on the far end of the room, there’s a lot of sort of stacked-up barrels.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Hm.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Do we see anything that even remotely resembles a coolerator
full of eggs? No.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] No.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah, Merkis is examining the grate. Does it have a hinge or anything like that?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It looks pretty solid. It does not look like it’s meant to be moved. Do you wanna roll REA, to see the nature of its construction?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Merkis is gonna roll 12, and got a 7.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] There is a charge on it from the other side, with a very very simple switch so it can be blown up and go out, meaning in the direction you are. But there’s no seeming way to easily get through this iron grate from your side, other than, you know, destroying it.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Merkis points to that corner where the charge is, and - trying not to talk so loudly - [ IC ] [whispering] Do you see that? That would be very loud.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Uh, you wanna get through this grate? > Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Yes?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Do I have to do everything here? Okay.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Are you gonna be loud?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] [unsure] Uh...?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] [still whispering] It would help us if we were not loud! > Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] I think- it sh- There might be some buzzing?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Buzzing!?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] A normal amount of buzzing.
[ OOC ] How loud is “Devour”? The class power?
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Oh.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Ooh.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] That’s a good questions.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] That’s a great question.
[laughing]
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] I think maybe a little bit of buzzing, possibly, but- > Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] I would guess quiet.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] I don’t think it’s loud. > Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Great!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Because it’s nanorobots slowly stripping atoms from a thing. Like, layer by layer.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] So, yeah, Remy’s gonna step up to the grate, and put his hand on it, and I think at first nothing is gonna look like it’s happening, until his skin starts doing the bowling thing again.
[high-pitched buzzing and chittering]
A little bit. Although, you guys are behind him, you wouldn’t see it. You wouldn’t see it. But the metal starts dripping down, and Remy steps back, and I think an opening that we could crouch through begins to reveal itself.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, you eat through your hand the iron, and you slowly feel very full, like you’re eating a full meal. And the nanites, this blood mist extruded from your hand, is just kind of lightly coloring the gate. At first very slowly, and then very, very quickly, kind of dissolving it, and there’s a little bit of sorta iron filings dripping down, but a lot of it is just disappearing in that it’s going into your bloodstream.
And soon you’ve devoured enough that you can, you know, push past the grate. You do probably feel like, sickly full. It’s not organic. It doesn’t taste good. It would restore health, actually, according to the power. It’d give you d4 health.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah. So it gave me 4 health, which I can’t use. [laughing] So - > Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, but you guys can move on into this rectangular
basement.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Do I have to do everything for you guys?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] It’s like you were made for this, Remy.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Yeah, it’s almost like somebody designed it.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Yeah, we drop down carefully.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Okay. Well, you’re like, going forward into this space. And I’d say you might want to roll to perceive. Just to see what’s around. It’s pretty big.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Is that a WIL roll?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] That is a WIL roll.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] 3.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Merkis got a 7.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] I mean, 3 out of 4 isn’t bad.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Zeshdano got an 11.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Ooh!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Oh, wow. Yeah, I was gonna say, 7’s quite good. 11’s great. [ low, tense drones ]
So, yeah, Remy is feeling kinda full. But Merkis and Zeshdano, you see that indeed this is a storage area, and there are lots of metal barrels that might have valuables, maybe just like, wine, you don’t know. And they’re mostly against the far side of the room. And there is only one stair
up, in the dark, far right corner of the room, there’s a wrought-iron spiral stair. Again, there’s a pretty low ceiling, but it does seem to go up into, presumably, the house, it’d have to go into the house, basically.
And you also notice something else. You feel, almost before you see, a little red light, sort of pinging, like, looking around the room, [high-pitched oscillation] at random, sort of scattering, from that back corner. From the sort of top, back, right point in the room.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Like a stationary light? Or is it reflecting or it’s moving?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] No, like a laser pointer. Like a laser pointer with a cat.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Oh. So it’s moving?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Huh.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] I don’t think I like that.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] But we can’t see the source of it.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] No. It’s coming from the top of the stairs, basically. But it’s quite - it’s pretty dark.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] And also, it seems like there is a bounded area that it is covering.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It bounces around pretty much the whole room. > Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Oh, okay.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] But you notice - I’m telling you, you notice, at least Zeshdano and Merkis, like, right away.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] So, you don’t get - like, it doesn’t touch you.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] But you see it as soon as you step into the room.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] And then - it moves quickly enough that it would be hard to avoid, I’m assuming.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You could do that, by rolling, or using a power, but it would be very hard.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Okay. Very hard. Okay, good.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Mm. Yeah. Merkis puts an arm out, so that Remy doesn’t take a
step forward.
[01:05:00] > Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Whoa. Okay, whoa, whoa.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] And he points - [ IC ] There’s, uh, security.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Oh, well, then maybe we just wait here for the signal. Outside of the security area.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] I think that’s wise. [ drones subside ]
[ gentle strings resume ]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Back to Dry Team. You take the tour of the south wing. You see some bedrooms, they’re airy and beautiful. You see some weird art on the walls, like giant copper disks engraved with images of what look like dinosaurs and robots fighting each other, but in a very, very artful way, sort of like the Bayeux Tapestry, which is like, dudes killing each other by the hundreds, is actually, like, beautiful. And there’s like, a unicorn or something. I think I’m mixing that up. Anyway, you know, the Norman Invasion one. There’s some low-
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Someone had to go up there and get all the damn unicorns out of England. Right?
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, right? Otherwise they’d be all over the place. > Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] God, practically overrun with them, jeez!
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Yeah, they’re like rats.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Jeez, yeah. God bless America. Yeah, no that’s - So, there’s low sort of teak furniture, and there’s a couple strange metal urns that you think might be archeatech and might do something cool, like make a beautiful sort of incense fog, or who knows, maybe they sort of turn milk into delicious cheese. And, yeah, there’s just a number of rich person things in the South Wing of the house. It’s definitely the lived-in portion of the house. You haven’t seen anything that looks too classified or dangerous.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Mhm.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] And Théyé has no ego about, like - you know, she shows you her unmade bed, or whatever. It doesn’t - none of it really matters to her in a very personal sense,
you get the sense.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Hm. Interesting.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] She is a consummate businessperson. She is chatting the whole time, asking you about where you got all your stuff. She seems to be asking your affiliation with the Company, the Worshipful Company, since you do speak Spin, and you have like, weird tech, and she’s not sure another way to bracket you. But you’ve told her, you know, you have your own company, which she also understands the concept of. And occasionally, one of the other Fex comes in and whispers in her ear something, and you sort of vaguely overhear it has to do with a pirate convocation happening tomorrow.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Mm.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] So, she’s taking, you know, a couple minutes out of her day to
show you guys around when she should be sort of planning for a big meeting.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Oh, perfect. Ah. Oat sees an opportunity. And he brainwaves to
Beta. [ IC ] [echoing] Beta! Beta, whisper hurriedly to me.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Beta whispers hurriedly to Oat.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Yes, uh, of - No, of course I- No, I understand. Um - Madame Théyé, I hate to be a bother, but I believe that it seems that we are taking, of course, more of your time than we had intended. The most important things for us to see today in order to decide if we’d like to go on with the trade would be a staff review, and to see the capability of your secure facilities. Of course, with full respect to your operational security. There’s nothing we appreciate more than, of course, security. [laughing] I mean that’s very clear. But, yes, we need to see what size vaults we could potentially build in, show us the lower levels - we need to determine how safe this facility would be for The Alpha.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] And then, Beta, again feeling very confident in this whole thing, kind of says something to Oat in Late Tephnian, and rubs her belly. And then says - [ IC ] [echoing] And say I need a nursery! A secure nursery!
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] And I should say, well, I - this is a sensitive subject, but of course, we are more than usually obsessed, or thoughtful, toward security these days with the little Alpha on its way. We would of course need a place, a secure place, perhaps below ground, for a secure nursery. [pause] The nursing procedures for Alpha are complicated, and some cultures would say violent, and we would like to keep that outside of the community eye, as it were. You understand.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Yes, of course. Well, your privacy - First of all, I’m not necessarily selling you my house, I like living in it, but it is quite private, and - sure, while we’re on this journey together, and you could tell me more about this starship, why don’t I show you the north wing, my offices.
And if you’re talking about underground - there’s not much underground in Graffa, other than
tunnels full of brain rats and mutants and whatnot. There is a cellar, we keep the wine there, that’s about it, but everything secure, I would have in my offices of course, so we can guard it.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Is there passageway to the tunnels below, or would we have to install that ourselves? Hypothetically, of course.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] She’s - she looks extremely suspicious about this line of questioning. She says -
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Oh, no, I - [ OOC ] Oat sees that and says - [ IC ] I understand if you don’t want to discuss specifics, but of course we need to, you know, adjudicate the general shape of things, of course, you understand.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Well, right, if I actually sold you the house, you could just go through the house. What I’m saying is if you wanted to see the north wing, that would be, frankly, where I show off my all my cool pirate stuff. The cellar is -
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Oh, well, I mean - we’ve got time for cool pirate stuff, I think! The Grey, what do you think? Do we have time for cool pirate stuff?
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] [ intoning, with murmuring reverberations ] There is always time for cool pirates.
[laughing]
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] So ominous. Jesus Christ.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Oat brainwaves to Vynos - [ IC ] [echoing] I’m gonna kiss you when this is over!
[laughing]
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Vynos, by the way, is still blue and electrified -
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Just calmly walking through the house.
[01:09:58] > Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] I’m almost floating. Yeah.
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] I should say, all of the Fex other than Fresheyen, are hissing at you. Whenever you come near them, they sort of go [hissing] and their hairs stand on end.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Vynos is making the same sound.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Beta, you might wanna start broadcasting to the Wet Team.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Yeah. With this, as she’s hearing Théyé describe everything of
value would be in the north wing, Beta kind of connects the aetherspeak again with every- No, she doesn’t put everyone online. She just talks to Zeshdano. And says to Zeshdano - [ IC ] [echoing] The north wing. It’s gotta be in the north wing. We’re headed there now.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Zeshdano says - [ IC ] [echoing] We’re in the wine cellar? Do you know how to get from the wine cellar to the north wing? Also, it looks like there’s a weird security system here, that, I don’t know what it does. There’s a lot of blinking lights.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] [echoing] Huh. Interesting. [pause] Nope! [laughing]
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Okay. [ IC ] [echoing] Okay, we’re kind of trapped here for the time being, so if you come up with anything, we would love to know about it.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You guys cross through the concourse into the north wing, into the offices. It’s much more cramped here, so it’s not like a huge open layout with really big area rooms. It’s a series of smaller, you know, more narrow hallways, full of stuff on the walls. There are sort of engraven plaques showing a young Théyé defeating a whole armada of pirates. And there’s lots of small, locked doors. Most of them Théyé does not have Fresheyen open.
You go through sort of an elbow-shaped hallway into a larger central hallway that opens onto - you can see cracked doors, these double doors on the left open onto sort of a big drawing room that’s central to this wing. And straight ahead is a very, very ornate wooden door, with a really big lock, with like a passkey, like a more technically complex lock system.
And she gestures into the drawing room, and says - [ IC ] You might take a look in there. It’s pretty dope. That’d be where I sit and do a lot of work. Gets good sun, there’s a skylight. And straight ahead is where I keep everything secure. Obviously, again, I’m not necessarily selling you my house, and I’d have to move all my stuff out if I were, but I could let you peek in? It’s broad day, you’re not armed, and my guards are with me. I would ask, of course, that you be respectful. This is just stuff that’s taken me a long time to acquire, in many cases, so-
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Of course.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] What do you say, does that sort of answer your question about
secure vaults?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] We are humbled.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Fresheyen. [ OOC ] He opens the door.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] When we look around, what do we see that would be cool. Like, immediately, we’d be able to like, comment on, or at least be like, “Wow!”
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] In the drawing room, there’s tons of stuff. There’s a whole articulated, what looks like a narwhal but with like squid tentacles that had bones in them?
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Oh, nice.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] And she’s also got a fully-articulated - or, I’m sorry, taxidermied - what looks like a small bear? But with just kind of like, no face, just like, a large kind of lamprey mouth. Like a large circular sixteen-jawed mouth. Just kinda standing there.
She’s got a sumptuous gold cloth over this little blue settee, little couch. And as you come near it, the couch says in beautiful language, that probably you don’t understand, but it basically asks like a Japanese toilet, like, “What setting would you like? Would you like me to be warmer? Cooler? Massage? Rippling massage? Play cheery music? Play chill music? Or play it’s-that-time-of-the-evening music?”
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] It’s-that-time-of-the-evening music!!
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] And it’s saying all of this in a language you don’t speak. [laughing]
It starts playing, like, yeah, like far-future D’Angelo from a chair, basically.
[ suddenly, lo-fi hip-hop beats with vibey electric piano ]
Yeah, there’s stuff like that. She’s got a lot of knick-knacks stuffed into this wing of the house. It doesn’t seem like she uses a lot of them. But maybe - she did say she sits in the drawing room, so obviously she likes all that stuff. She likes looking at the bear, the lamprey bear. But yeah, she’s willing to show you the trophy room, once you’re all ready.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Please, yes.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Okay. [ IC ] So, we’re just gonna go in quickly and have a peek, and then we’re gonna shut the door again. The windows are barred. Just normal windows - they’re small, it’s the only room that has really small windows of the exterior rooms. And the walls are thicker and reinforced. The bars are really thick, it’s like six-inch solid iron bars through the windows. And they’re just little rectangular slits at the top, you’ll see.
The floor’s also reinforced, because sometimes people drill through houses here in Graffa. That’s a problem we have. Often the brain rats will get people to drill through. It’s a real problem. Falling down actually is a huge problem in Graffa. Just falling straight down. Uh, so that’s reinforced.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Why?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] It’s porous, the stone. So you just don’t want to fall down, and go
like, a hundred feet into a cave. It sucks. Fresheyen lost his leg.
[ OOC ] And you can tell that’s like, a sore subject, and he looks kinda irked that she brought
that up.
[01:14:50] [ IC ] But yeah, he’s recovered of course. And when we go in, just the one thing I have to tell you about is HANBI. And HANBI’s been with me for a minute. HANBI is technically a war machine, but a very small war machine, I mean, he fits in the room obviously. But HANBI is the main security here. I would be taking HANBI with me, probably, so you understand, I assume you would bring your own guard systems. But HANBI sort of does it all, he is a guard - it is a guard system. You understand what I mean. But just, no sudden movements. Yeah, he can be a little intimidating. Okay, we’re ready?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] And what does HANBI - ? Oh, HANBI’s inside the vault. She’s warning us about what the-
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yes, yes, inside the trophy room. > Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] HANBI’s inside the trophy room, okay.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Fresheyen punches in some numbers on the keypad. [keypad chimes five times] And you hear a heavy sort of bank lock system. [ vault clicking ] You know, wheels turning. Click click click click click. And something releases. [ vault clunks open ] And she just pushes this heavy door open, goes on in. It’s her room. And it’s a normal - it’s like the others, it’s a big cubic room. You can kinda tell the walls are thicker, the windows are indeed really small at the top, with these big steel bars.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Wait, Wythe, did you say - how did she open the door?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It’s just one big heavy metal door with a big lock that has like
a number pad.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Okay.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Like a clunky weird bank vault kind of number pad.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] And did she type it in?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Fresheyen typed it in, and then she pushed it open once he had typed it in.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] I-
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] He blocked it with his body as he put it in.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] I’m gonna roll “Steal”. Steal is a move: “Name a stealable object or overhearable or glance-at-able phrase or password and burn d8 GRT.”
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Hell yeah. [laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It’s a perfect use.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Hell yeah! What? That rules.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Oat was made for this heist!
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Yeah!
[laughing]
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] I’m a conman, I’m a rogue conman baby! All right. Fuck yes, 8!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Do you have to roll or it just happens.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Yes, I -
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Okay.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Oh, I burn - Oh, so, oh no, that’s bad! [laughing]
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Yeah, that’s the maximum.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Oh, you burn 8! No...
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] I burn d8 GRT. But I, no, then I roll my MOV plus my level. Okay.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Oh, no you have to burn 8.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Cause you have to do it sneakily and not get caught, right? That’s the -
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Yeah, yeah. But I’ve got great MOV. > Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Burn that GRT, burn that GRT. > Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Do not fail this.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] d12...
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] B that G...
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Loving our three-GM game. [laughing] This is amazing.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Well, I feel like Mike’s really committed to not GM-ing right now, which is different.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] I’m not GMing here either, I don’t know what the fuck’s going on!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It’s true! No, that’s true, that’s true.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Yeah. All right, so I gotta lose motherfucking 8.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Can Zeshdano, over the aetherspeak use “Bark” to say - [ IC ] Hey, Oat should steal a passcode if you see any!
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, I mean-
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] And give him a boost?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, if you use Bark, I guess that’s how that works? You inspire Oat to perform this excellently.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It’s very much like in Ocean’s Eleven, Twelve, or Thirteen, when they’re just yelling at each other over the walkies or whatever, but actually doing the con at the same time.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Yeah. Yeah. > Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Oh, wow.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] That’s - Zeshdano is like, in the silence as you guys are listening to Théyé, knowing that you’re connected, is like - [ IC ] How, uh - How’s it going? I mean, I imagine Oat is like, built for this kind of thing, is he like, looking at uh- [ OOC ] No, she’s not connected to Oat directly, so it wouldn’t work, so never mind.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] No, just to me, yeah.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Scratch it. Yeah, yeah yeah yeah.
[laughing]
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] But Beta is saying to Zeshdano - [ IC ] [echoing] Oat is doing an - you - I wish you could see Oat. Oat is in his element! He is really sellin’ this.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] [echoing] Nice, nice. [ OOC ] And actually, while they’re in the basement, Zeshdano turns to Remy and actually does use Bark, and says to Remy like - [ IC ] Hey, can’t your nanites that ate the stuff just like, turn off machines? Can’t you just send them to go turn off whatever that thing is?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Yes. The answer is yes.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] I’m gonna burn 5 GRT, and you are gonna be able to add 5 to
your next roll.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Nice.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Okay.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] That’s huge.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah, that is actually huge. [laughing] This is when we cut back, I assume.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] 13, baby.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] 13!
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] [gasps] Ooh!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Very, very slickly, Oat, you’re able to, while maintaining a conversation with Théyé about the drawing room, and the lamprey bear, you can see sort of with your other eye, exactly the numbers. And you arouse no suspicion. And you have the numbers. It is 1-2-3-4-5.
[laughing]
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Jesus Christ! That’s the code on my luggage! All right, I broadcast
that code immediately to Beta.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Okay.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] And Beta immediately broadcasts it to Zeshdano.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Okay.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] As well as - she’s also telling Zeshdano exactly where they are right now in the house.
[ vault clunks open ]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Okay, the door opens, and you see beyond this dim room. Cause it doesn’t get a lot of light, it’s just got sunlight in there right now, there’s no lanterns or anything. And it’s basically just this cube lined with low dark wooden cabinets that are not terribly deep. And a couple of them are glass-fronted, most are not. The ones that are glass-fronted you can see have inside like, basically jewels, just like heaps of jewels. They’re all displayed. Everything looks dusty, it doesn’t look like anyone comes in here that much. It’s just full of valuables.
The most immediate thing though, the first thing you see is, on the floor of the room, is a little bit shorter than a person, so probably about Merkis’s height, what looks like a cross between like a red high heel and a wine glass made of red plastic. But also a little bit like a sumo wrestler with four little sort of insectoid legs, and then four little stubby gun arms.
It sort of turns and begins speaking at you in Late Tephnian. And very clearly only I guess Beta understands this. It is just saying - [ IC ] [ high-pitched, low-res robotic voice ] Oh, hell. What do I have to do today? I hate when they open the door. I hope I don’t fuck this up.
[01:19:58] [laughing, howling laughter]
[ OOC ] And it levels like, four guns at you. It’s just like, pointing gun arms at you. But it’s saying that. And none of you - the rest of you hear like the scariest - I mean, it sounds like, terrifying. [laughing] But Beta, you understand it. You speak Late Tephnian.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] Oh, I don’t think you’ll fuck this up.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It stops. The gun arms go straight in the air, and it stutters back on its little legs, and you see, it has a sort of little tail that’s like a - it’s like a red Solo cup sticking out of its butt, and that is shooting a little beam of light and you can actually see that the floor - there’s a section of the floor that’s just a wrought-iron grate that seems to be covering just a deep hole. And it’s shining a little red light down there. And it stops and the red light stops moving, its gun arms go straight up, and it immediately starts asking you - [ IC ] Oh crap, oh crap. Are you here to kill me? Who won the wars? Who is the - [laughter, HANBI incomprensible under laughter] Which of the Blood Empresses reigns on Tephnii? Great and everlasting throughout the void? Oh my gooood. Please don’t kill me. If you have to kill me, please don’t rip my arms off first. Oh shit, I shouldn’t have said that, that’s a good idea. I would do that.
[laughing]
[ OOC ] HANBI’s just terrified of you.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] What a dweeb!
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Beta-
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] I love - this is my favorite character. [laughing]
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] I love robots in psychic pain. [laughing] That’s like my favorite - yeah. Robots that feel bad.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] This poor guy! Oh gosh.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Beta just says - [ IC ] Don’t worry. I’m on your side. [laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Which side is that? It says - you know, it looks at Théyé, looks at you, and seems clearly confused. Fresheyen looks at it and says, you know, “¿Dónde es el baño?,” like, trying to calm it down. [laughing] Is just saying, like, “Ni hao,” over and over again in Late Tephnian.
[laughing]
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Jesus.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] And so there’s sort of three of you interacting with HANBI. HANBI occupies, you know, it’s like, a little awkward, because you have to go around him to get to the cabinets, but Théyé also doesn’t want you to go into the cabinets full of jewels, but just sort of shows you, there’s a bunch of lockboxes, it’s hard to get in this room, and if you get in there’s a robot with guns just like waiting here. That’s her security that you wanted to see, Oat. I mean, Demiurge Postlethwaite.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Yeah, thank you. Oat looks at Alpha, and says, brainwaves to Beta - [ IC ] [echoing] Uh, are you talking to the uh, gun robot?
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] And Beta says - [ IC ] [echoing] It’s - I am - I haven’t spoken out loud and conversed with someone in Late Tephnian, oh, since - I mean, it’s really hard for me to remember. This is so exciting!
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] [echoing] Well, can you get him to be on our side or something?
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] [echoing] I’ll try... [ OOC ] Beta says to the robot - [ IC ] What do
they pay you here?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Uh - pay me? [ OOC ] It communicates that for five thousand years - it has a long interesting story. It’s sort of floated down the river, and to summarize it real briefly, it ended up on Kakudun in a last-ditch mysterious Post-Tephnian - this was like, some weird survivor state, that could no longer create the nano-mothers to drive the whole civilization, but still had a lot of advanced nanotech weaponry. So you just get sort of images in its description of essentially like, Gundam robots with just sort of like, wraith-like mists for legs, sort of descending out of low orbit and shooting one another with tactical nuclear weapons, and this this just standing there like - [ IC ] Oh shit. Oh shit.
[ OOC ] And then it is alone on a desert landscape, wandering around Kakudun, as Kakudun enters a little ice age, and as the snows creep south it just also starts walking south. And eventually it is stolen by some pirates. And it is won in a card game by Théyé many years ago, and has loyally served Théyé. And it has gotten everything it wanted, which is to be left the fuck alone and not have to do anything ever, because no one tries to rob from the second-most powerful - at certain times the most powerful - pirate in Graffa. So, it hasn’t even had to like, shoot a guy, in ten years.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] And then, after hearing this, Beta says, [ IC ] [sighs] Well, I hate - I hate to break it to you, but you’re needed.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Aw, crap.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Fuck yes!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It seems disappointed.
[laughing]
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] So you’re going to have to come with us. But, play it cool.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Uh, it doesn’t totally understand what you want it to do, given that it has very explicit instructions to not let anyone steal anything from this room. And to not leave the room. Which it is very happy with those things.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Mm.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] That’s been very easy to do.
[01:24:35] > Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Uh, Théyé. I - this is strange, this rarely happens, you see. We are travelers, we have been so many places and seen so many things, it’s easy, even required some might say, for people in our line of work to become jaded, detached, analytical and aromantic toward the objects of our labor. But every once in a while, I have the pleasure of seeing my mistress become enamored of her greatest joy, Late Tephnian war technology.
[laughing]
[ OOC ] And I sort of derisively gesture towards the rest of the vault. [ IC ] I’m sure this is all interesting to you, but I know when I see love at first sight. You - aside from our original deal, perhaps we can offer some sort of trade in order to acquire this incredible object, if I understand my mistress’s wishes correctly? Yes, Alpha?
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Beta is mindspeaking to Oat - [ IC ] [echoing] So why don’t we - we should like, get this guy out of this room, maybe take it downstairs -
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] [echoing] I’m working on it! I gotta - oh, god, wait! Wait! Do you have the Ylythnari visor?
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] [echoing] Yeah, I have the Ylythnari visor!
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] [echoing] Beautiful. [out loud] Madame Théyé, we would like to offer - I have been authorized to offer a trade for your sentry here. And my mistress has required that she offer our side of the trade first.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] So, Beta does the same thing that she did downstairs, where she kind of puts her finger up, and gestures to Théyé to come a little closer. Is very animated as she ruffles through her bag, and pulls out just the tip of the Ylythnari visor.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] [laughing] I’m gonna say the same thing: Roll CHA for sort of the hard sell through mime hands and like, you know, backpack sneaks, like a high school drug deal. [laughing] With this incredibly sophisticated banker and essentially politician.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Burn GRT baby, burn GRT!
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] I did. Okay, I got 8.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] She only got a 7! So it’s good you burned GRT. > Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Oh ho ho!
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Ooh!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] She wants to call bullshit, but once again is honestly impressed. It really is like - “What is this thing?” She’s never seen anything like it, and it clearly looks powerful.
As you’re doing this, however, HANBI does start saying in Tephnian, in a very scary voice all of a sudden - [ IC ] [hum of chainsaws] Uh, you’re too close! You’re too close!
[ OOC ] And little chainsaw sickle things start emerging from its knees, and it starts moving towards you with chainsaw knees, trying to get you to back up away from Théyé, as per its instructions. And Théyé sort of gestures to calm down, and wants to keep looking at the thing you’re showing her.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Oh, of course little friend, of course, back up. Madame - [ OOC ] And I wait for Alpha to sort of back up. And then I say to Théyé - [ IC ] There’s a cult of Cthulicate worshippers that call this Ylythnari artifact, “The Visionary Head”. They claim it is the forgotten skull of an Ylythnari demigod. Its actual provenance is far stranger and mysterious, but the lore, as they say with objects of these provenances, that’s part of the value.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] I mean, that’s more or less true other than you made up a name for it, right, but uh, yeah - she is vaguely interested in learning more? She does want you to leave her vault, and she suggests - [ IC ] ... we retire to the drawing room and we could discuss? You’ve seen the droid, I mean it just sort of sits there, that’s what it does, it has chainsaw knees.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Yes, and we would like to buy the droid with the Ylythnari artifact, and we would like to buy it now.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Oh, I understand. Why don’t we go to the drawing room.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Well why don’t we just leave the Ylythnari artifact here and uh, we can
purchase the droid and the droid can come with us?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Uh... She does not understand why the hurry?
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Also, point of order, maybe I missed it: Have you seen the eggs yet?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] [laughing] No.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] No.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] No, we have not verified the eggs are in here.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] We have not verified - we have not gotten eyes on the eggs.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] But, this little war robot is the thing that is keeping you from exiting the cellar.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Yeah, but we maybe have a solution to that on our end. So
don’t push it too hard if it get-
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] All right!
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] You know what I mean? Like - play it through, but if it doesn’t work out, like, there are things that we can try to do.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] As they’re talking, Beta is talking to the little war robot, and said - [ IC ] On my signal, you’ll have to come with me.
[laughing]
You’re wanted.
[01:29:40] > Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Oh, this is terrible. This is just like the wars again. I don’t understand. I have very advanced programming. I have copies of whole sections of the Ultranet, but I do not understand how to serve two masters at once. That goes directly against my entire sort of war fighting manual. Which specifically says, “You can’t have mutually opposite objectives.” You can’t get ‘em both done! It doesn’t make any sense. I can’t both stay here and leave here.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] Who was your first king you served?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It runs through - it basically starts executing a program of listing people from five thousand years ago, and they have really long titles, and it’s just like reading out a list of who showed up at the Oscars, it’s just like, reading out a list of celebrities from five thousand years ago.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] And it’s gonna take a long time to get through, like, all of its consecutive owners over the years. It essentially served one house, and then there was a great aporia, a time when it served no one, and most recently it has been serving this nice pirate lord, who has allowed it to just hang out on its own, and occasionally listen to frightening Tephnian dubstep in this, essentially, closet.
[laughing]
And not have to engage in war fighting, which it secretly really hates.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] I love him.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] Your first king calls for you. I’ll be seeing you soon.
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It just restarts the list - it’s like - [ IC ] That person died. Five thousand years ago.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Promise it a vacation! [laughing] This thing wants to not work. [laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] I witnessed him die. It was horrible!
[laughing]
[ OOC ] I think as you’re having this conversation, Fresheyen is extremely suspicious, and it just trying to break up you talking to HANBI. And also, yeah, Théyé is also very suspicious, and wants to leave the vault. I would say if you want to roll to perceive-
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Yeah. Let’s look around, let’s all perceive.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Especially Vynos, who’s not done something else the entire
time.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Yes, I’ve been looking around -
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Great.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] While this is all going on. That is a WIL check, right?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yes. And I would say, maybe you want to roll with advantage, since you’ve basically just been perceiving, as opposed to Beta and Oat.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Doing our Dirty Rotten Scoundrels routine. > Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] I got two 7s, so, 7.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Oh, great. Vynos, you see that one of the cabinets, it has a wooden front, but has clearly got like, a mechanical thing behind it. It doesn’t seem terribly complex. You’re guessing that is the coolerator, it is sort of a primitive refrigerator, that just has like, a wood panel to match the other basically just locked, bank vault style boxes. And that that is probably where the eggs are if they are in a sort of primitive fridge.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Vynos relays this to Beta and suggests that we move along before we raise any more suspicions. And just say that they’ll have to deal with the robot.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] So Beta says this all to Zeshdano.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] As Oat and Beta, or Postlethwaite and Alpha are both not leaving, she gets - she sort of snaps, and she stands and really, you know, puts on the airs of like, a powerful politician, and explains that, you know, you’re guests in her house? And that she has very important things to do. And she’s not sure she’s going to sell her house, because she’s not sure you have a starship quite frankly. But if you want to show evidence of this and discuss, she’s willing to do that, but she’ll do it in the drawing room, with the lamprey bear.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Oh oh oh, of course. Lead the way.
[ transition music, a slow throbbing beat, fades in and out ]
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] So, Zeshdano has just given a boost via Bark to Remy. And has asked him whether or not his nanites can turn off whatever that thing is. And I think now we know that it is a small nervous Tephnian war machine of some kind. I don’t know whether or not Remy would know how likely his success would be at that?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Remy doesn’t have to know. > Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Okay.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] This is just like, this is a power. You can send your nanites into any electrical device - an be a standard Tephnian comm, dumb ancient radio, or sapient brain, etc. - to induce any specific effect possible. So, the answer is, yes, it just like - if the roll is to kill the thing, then it rolls - it like, gains an additional WIL check. But basically, it’s like a straight up roll.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Got it. What do we want it to do? Is turning it off killing it? Does that count as killing? Or as like -
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Well, if they don’t know how to turn it back on, then yes. > Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] But I don’t think we need to kill it, so much as we need it to be dumb for a little while.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Why don’t we make it - can we make it perceive that it is...
Okay, a beach is bad, because it was stranded on a desert island. Um-
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] I mean, I feel like maybe making it perceive that everything is normal for like, half an hour-
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Sure. Fair.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah. And that we’re not stealing.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] That nothing has changed.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Nothing is changed, yeah.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] We’re not stealing.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Basically, looping the security footage, except in its own perception.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yes, that’s exactly what I was thinking. > Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Ah!
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] I was like, “Ah, yes, Fun City.” [laughing]
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Got it. Perfect.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Never destroy the security tapes.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Never. Leave a trail.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] [laughing] Never.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] So, it gets to roll WIL against your REA or CHA, whatever’s better, to detect the manipulation.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yes.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] But the manipulation happens anyway. And since you’re not
trying to kill it, that’s all that happens. It’s just that roll, and then, hacked.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Also, nobody can understand it. That’s the other thing. [laughing] [01:35:00] > Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Except you guys, yeah.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] So even if it’s crying out for help, if it’s not shooting - Anyway, uh, so you used Bark, which means I have 5 - is it 5 GRT or 5 to my roll?
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] It adds 5 to your roll.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Okay.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Hell yeah!
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] All right. Okay, so I’m gonna burn 8 GRT. That's a 9.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Uh, it rolled a natural 1. And it has a very high die. But uh- > Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah, I was gonna say like, 9’s not gonna cut it.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Heck yeah! What? Okay.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Very nice.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] So, yeah, what does - Do you just make the butt cam not work, essentially?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] I think what’s gonna happen is Remy’s going to take a deep breathe, and just go [blowing out] - and send a bunch of his, you know, I guess it looks like a bloody sort of mist, toward the light. [quiet buzzing] And I think he wants, he just wants the robot to change its perception such that it just does not see anything wrong no matter what happens for like, the next two hours.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Great. Yeah, it continues to act exactly the same, but you are sure it worked, and it does not know that this has happened. It probably begins singing. It is very relaxed now.
[laughing]
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Aw.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] So everyone else hears a very weird disconcerting like, horrible sort of techno whale song from the trophy room.
[ high-tempo, chaotic, electronic music, with robot whirring along ]
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] It has been established that sometimes it listens to terrible
music, so.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Well, just very different. Five thousand year old, so the ideas about what good and bad music is, these things change rapidly.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Right, yeah.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, but you made it work. The nanites were not detected by it, because, you know, it’s not gonna detect motes of dust, or like, rats, so it just ignored them. They entered its nanotech body, and it was very nervous and distracted, it was really excreting a proverbial rectangular prism due to its split loyalty with someone else asking it to do things. And yeah, it is now completely just ignoring all of its duties for the next hour.
[ music continues, muffled ]
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Guys, that’s how you know it worked.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Merkis tilts a head and just starts making his way toward those stairs.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] So, nothing? I don’t get anything for that? No thank you, no- Hey! > Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] We’re all trying to be discreet down here!
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Zeshdano turns around, and looks Remy in the eyes, and puts a hand on his shoulder, and says - [ IC ] You did a very good job, and I’m sure everyone on your team is extremely proud of you.
[laughing]
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Thank you for saying that, cause you had to, because I asked. But I
appreciate it.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] She turns around and follows Merkis.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] The stairs at the back corner, wrought iron spiral stairs. Very narrow. They go up. And the aperture at the top is a grate into a dim cubic room lined with wooden cabinets. There’s thin windows at the top. And you can see that kind of from below, from the grate. And obscuring your view is what looks like a red Solo cup with a laser pointer on the end. And on top of that, a massive droid thing. You can’t really tell what it is. It has four little insectoid robot legs, and it’s constantly sort of shuffling around. It’s making a horrible noise. You’re not sure if it’s in pain, or what. Remy might know that it’s relaxed and singing.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] So, am I imagining this correctly? We’re in a stairwell, and we’re looking up, and in the ceiling of the stairwell there’s a grate, and on the other side of the grate is this machine that is making this horrible noise.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah, the trophy room.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah. One of you can be directly beneath it at a time. You know, it’s like a narrow stairwell at one end of the room.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Yeah. Zeshdano points at the grate and then points at Remy again, and says like - [ IC ] Hey, uh - if you wanna follow up two great successes with another, can you eat more metal?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Ugh. Yeah, I’m- I- you know, I could do it? I might be useless in a fight afterward. But hopefully we don’t have to fight?
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Zeshdano crosses her fingers and puts them up on either side of her head, but then is also shrugging while doing that.
[laughing]
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Merkis just is like, tightening a grip on the harpoon, and says - [ IC
] I can fight. I can fight now.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Yeah, of course I can do the thing again. Just gimme a second. [ OOC ] And he’s going to convert 15 health into 5 GRT. Uh... And that puts him at 7 health, but 11 GRT, so that’s good.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Zeshdano hands you what - she like, rifles in her bag, she sees that you’re looking a little grey and like, drawn. She reaches in and she hands you like, what kind of just looks like a Clif bar that’s just like, completely unwrapped. And she hands it to you and she says - [ IC ] Look, you don’t look so good, maybe you should eat something.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Yeah, I’m gonna eat this metal. Gimme a second. [ OOC ] And he takes it, and brushes the pocket lint off, and then uses - he burns 4 GRT and uses Devour again. So he’s eating metal. So I think he puts his hand up, and the grate just starts dripping to the ground, and sort of dissolving before it hits the stairs. [ quiet buzzing ]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] And let me roll for that. Okay, that’s 1 health from that. [ IC ] Ugh,
metal tastes so fuckin’ bad guys.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] And if you eat the weird candy bar, you’ll get another 13 health.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah, he’s gonna eat the weird candy bar. [laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, Remy feels very sickly full at this point. > Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Aw.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You’re eating a lot of weird stuff at once. But yeah, you do
feel energized. You feel the rush of sugar.
[01:39:56] > Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] It’s for the mission, it’s for the mission. Let’s get the fuck out, let’s get this done.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Above you, the thing that I described earlier, you finally see what it is as you eat more of the grate. It notices you but it just continues singing what is sort of like the worst heavy metal version of like, “Welcome to Margaritaville” from five thousand years ago.
[laughing]
It does not know you’re there. It is just singing to itself. You can kind of scuttle between it and the floor. It’s a little tight. But you can sort of army crawl out of the hole.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah. Remy commando crawls out.’
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Zeshdano looks up and looks at the - like, the space and the arrangement of things, and looks at Merkis, and says - [ IC ] I think you might be the one who is best suited for crawling around in there. [ OOC ] She’s gonna use Bark again, and she’s gonna give you +5 to your next roll.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Oh! That’s amazing. Thank you.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Yeah, I’m just really cruising through GRT here.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah, Merkis nods and slithers up, still holding the case thing, of fake eggs.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah, what do we see in this room?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] The Late Tephnian miniature war machine is just squatting over the hole that you’re emerging from, so you kind of have to gingerly move around it. And it occupies a bunch of the room. But you can sort of dance around it, where it’s not touching you, and against the walls are cabinets, low wooden cabinets, dark wooden cabinets. And most of them - or, all of them locked, and most of them not glass-fronted. A couple are, and you see in the glass beautiful jewels. And you see one of the cabinets in the corner clearly has some sort of compressor technology sort of behind it. It’s not like the others. And you’re guessing that might be a fridge.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah, Merkis is scanning the room for technology or the sound of whirring. And is drawn to that cabinet. So he gets to work looking at the front, seeing if there’s any way to open it, unlatch it.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It is not locked. It is a mini fridge that is not locked, with a
very old-school compressor. And you can barely feel your senses, and barely hear yourself, because the electrical sense that you get off of the Late Tephnian war machine is incredibly strong, it’s just like, having the sun right next to you and you’re trying to look at something else. And also it’s really loud and annoying. But yeah, you’ve identified the fridge, and you can just open it.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Okay, Merkis opens it. And looks at the contents. > Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Please roll a d4.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Got a 2.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] You got +5!
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] 7.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Oh. [laughing]
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] What?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] No, wait, no.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] But what is it, though?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Right, okay. There are seven bottles of wine being chilled, and also the eight eggs behind them crammed in. It is very, very packed.
[laughing]
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] That is very funny.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Oh my god.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] The wine is very expensive. You can tell, looking at the label. These are like 100 Guilder each.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Oh!
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Just to be clear, yeah, Bark does say, “Next roll,” so -
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Oh god. Thanks for that.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] So Bark did make it so that, yes, I guess there are more bottles of wine.
[laughing]
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Okay.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Thanks for that, Mike. > Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Merkis.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Merkis gets to work putting the bottle of wine delicately on the floor so he can get to the eggs.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Merkis, what’s going on in there?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] They’re the eggs! The eggs are behind all these bottles of wine.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] While Merkis is working away at the fridge, Zeshdano thinks to Beta - [ IC ] [echoing] We’re in the storage room. We’re getting the eggs right now. We went in through the grate in the floor, and we turned off the little guy that’s in there.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Beta doesn’t respond. > Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Okay.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Merkis, you get the bottles, you very carefully put these seven bottles of Cathedonian orange wine on the floor without making a lot of noise, and -
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Remy grabs two and puts them in his bag. [laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] They are wine bottles, and they’re chilled. And they look really expensive. Really delish.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Great, great.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Behind them are eight leathern grey eggs. They’re clearly the
eggs Grand Shandy was talking about.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Okay, Merkis starts to remove the eggs, and trade them for the fake eggs that he has.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] This is something Merkis does not have to roll for. You know which ones are real, and which ones are fake. You’re all about those eggs. You make the swap.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] He’s like whispering to them - [ IC ] [ whispering ] I’m going to take you home. I’m going to take you home, reunite you with your family. [ OOC ] [laughing] He’s very invested in this. And then starts to put the bottles back into the fridge.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Did you put the fake eggs in? Did you get the fake eggs thing? > Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Yes, yes, yes, don’t rush me!
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Okay, all right! > Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Don’t rush me!
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] I’m going to start moving out. I’m gonna go meet up with Zesh, I wanna start moving back. Let’s get outta here as soon as we can.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] I’m on my way! I’m on my way! [ OOC ] And he’s trying to be as steely as possible, putting the wine bottles back quietly.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] Merkis, you’re doing a great job.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You hear two Fex guards shouting and greebling about how annoying HANBI is, and how they just need him to shut up, and what has gotten into him today, why did there have to be a visitor who could speak to him, what did she say to him, man their music is terrible, why can’t they play the sounds of dragonflies like normal forest creatures... And they are definitely going to eventually get to the point where they want to enter the room to argue with HANBI to shut up and stop singing.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah, Remy’s going back down through the grate. He’s leaving.
[01:45:00] > Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You know, Merkis, you’re the last out, right?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Mhm.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] And you have to slip below the war machine and get down the grate. And then also the grate is just gone, so you can’t replace the grate.
[ fridge door shutting ]
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] He shuts the fridge, and is walking with the eggs, the bag of eggs
in front of him so that he can hand it down.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] The handoff goes well. Do you want to make a MOV check, to very very quickly just get out of there?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah. [laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Okay. I would say, make a MOV check before anyone can
hear anything or open the door.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] I would argue that they wouldn’t be able to hear a thing because the
fuckin’ thing is singing, and it’s very loud and annoying. [laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] I mean, there’s not supposed to be anything from that room other than HANBI, sound-wise, so they might hear like, scuffling - that’s a far point though.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Okay.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Zeshdano uses Bark again, and says to Merkis - [ IC ] Get out
of there, get out of there! It’s time to go, time to go!
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Oh no...
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] And you get a 5 bonus.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Wow, you’re just-
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Right now?
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Right.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Oh, I got a 6.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Okay.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Cause I got a 1.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Oh, you got a 1. Okay.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Oh good.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] But you boosted it anyway?
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Yeah, but a 1 - a 1 is an automatic failure.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You are somewhat stuck when HANBI, in shifting, basically sits on you, and you don’t take damage, but you’re basically crushed beneath this war machine.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] I’m pinned, yeah.
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] As the door opens, and two Fex guards are yelling. > Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] [gasps]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] And I’m gonna just roll to see if they notice you.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah, Merkis just freezes.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Zeshdano-
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Who has the bag, who has the bag, who has the bag?
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] I have- Zeshdano has the bag. Is Merkis’s hand within reach of
the open-
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] I think his bottom half is down there.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Sure.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Like, can I hand Merkis something?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, yeah, I think one hand is free, yeah. Let’s say that.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Yeah. Zeshdano has the bag, Zeshdano also hands Merkis the pill.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Oh, good god.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Just in case.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] He knows what it is.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] And starts to step back, quietly, down the stairs.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] What happens is, the guards are yelling, and then instantly stop, and one of them says - [ IC ] Uh, hey dude, there’s a little person underneath HANBI! That’s why HANBI’s screamin’!
[laughing]
[ OOC ] And the other says - [ IC ] Nah, stop messin’ around, there’s no - Oh! There is a little
person under HANBI. That’s why HANBI’s screamin’.
[laughing]
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Zeshdano thinks at Beta - [ IC ] [echoing] Code red, code red,
they see Merkis!
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Merkis takes the pill!
[laughing]
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Ah!
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Oh my god.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] What are the rules of the pill again?
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Oh no. She’s goin’ until she hits water. > Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Oh no, I hope there’s water!
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] That’s fine.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] There’s water...
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Before initiative can be rolled, it metabolizes very quickly on your tongue, it just sort of melts away, enough of it melts away, and you feel yourself becoming lighter, because somehow your motion of your molecules becomes Brownian without - including like, the stuff that shouldn’t be, like your skeleton.
[laughing]
Without killing you.
[ HANBI’s music is replaced with reverberating humming]
And you and all your stuff, you just drop through the floor, through the stairs. You drop through, actually, Zeshdano and Remy. Which is maybe the worst part.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Ugh!
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] And they hear just the tea-kettle - [high-pitched squealing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] [laughing] And you drop, through the concrete of the basement, the cellar floor, and just drop into Graffa. You’re at least at the top. But you’re almost certainly just going to drop until you hit a lake in a limestone cave somewhere down in there. [laughing] And Merkis is just gone, leaving a sort of Merkis-shaped hole as he drops.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yes! [ HANBI’s music returns ]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] The guards are amazed, they’re just like - [ IC ] Where’d that little person go? [ OOC ] And HANBI is still screaming happily “Welcome to Tephnii”. What do the rest of you do at this point?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] I mean, Remy is booking it the other direction. He is-
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Same, Zeshdano is just like - “Well, we’ll solve that problem later.” And tries to go back exactly the way they came. As they’re leaving, looks at Remy and says - [ IC ] Until we know we need them, no explosions on the way out, right?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Gah, yeah. No, of course. We’re - > Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] Okay, good.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] This is the stealth part of the mission.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Beta transmits to - via aetherspeak, to both Vynos and Oat that
there’s a code red, we should probably get out of here.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Théyé, as soon as the guards are screaming, would have guards like, on you.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] [echoing] What’s happening? What’s going on? > Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] [echoing] Uh, code red.
[ placid string music ]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You guys are in the drawing room, talking to Théyé about the starship, presumably. Doing your con, whatever your con requires. And she’s sort of half-interested, just letting you go, and maybe telling you a little about the house. She doesn’t care that much about the details, that kind of thing, what she paid for it, or whatever.
From the other room, you hear two of her guards yelling, “There’s a little dude underneath HANBI!” And they’re yelling, you know, the equivalent of “Code red!” She has Fresheyen - instantly has a gun, sort of out, not really pointed at any of you specifically, but just out. And she also displaces herself. [electronic woosh] She now appears to be somewhere else in the room. And she says - [ IC ] I’m only going to ask this once, so I want you to be completely honest with me. Do you have anything to do with what’s going on in the other room.
[01:49:35] > Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] It could be several things. It could be the Ylythnari cultists coming to retrieve The Visionary Head - we did not come by it by strictly legal or ethical means. There are many people who would like to see The Alpha, or myself, or The Grey dead, or tried in certain courts. We’re gonna need to be more specific about what has occurred before we decide if it could be one of our loose ends coming back to hold us accountable. [ OOC ] And when he says “accountable” he does big air quotes.
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Uh - I suggest then, that we have this discussion at another time, it’s a very busy time here at Sleepmonger House, and you seem to have perhaps unintentionally made it busier. So let me attend to my screaming war machine guarding my treasures, and if you’ll be on your way, we can resume this conversation at a later time.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Yes, is there a back door? A back door? Some secure way to exit? > Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Why don’t I have Fresheyen see you either out the front or the
back as you like.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Back.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] The back leads to the beach, there’s not much to do on the beach. It’s a beach.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] The front, then.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Let’s do that.
[laughing]
[ OOC ] And the Fex sort of is very warily, like, wanting all three of you to go ahead of him, out of the house.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Is Vynos still pulsating? [laughing]
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Uh, yes.
[laughing]
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Yes.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Just casually rippling with energy, yeah.
[laughing]
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] To be clear-
[ string music fades ]
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] We do need our weapons back in order - in case we have to defend ourselves once we enter the street.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Yes, yes, yes. My men will see to it. Thank you all for coming by, and maybe we’ll talk again, maybe not.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] One only can hope.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] So nice to meet you, thank you for showing me strange treasures
from beyond our world. Et cetera, et cetera.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Bye!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] She’s cordial but insistent. You guys leave? > Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Yes!
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Yeah, we get out of there.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] We leave!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] If you don’t attempt to - > Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] This is great!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You just leave. Fresheyen obviously thinks you had something to do with it, but seems a little conflicted about what to do about that. He does ask one time - [ IC ] Can you talk to our war machine and ask what is going on? [ OOC ] - as you’re leaving.
[ HANBI’s music, quietly, in background ]
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Beta says to Oat in Late Tephnian, just some - what she wants for
dinner. But she’s not telling Oat anything.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Um - I’m afraid that my mistress must decline your invitation for further involvement in such a violent and uncertain manner. Good evening, good afternoon, and bye bye.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Understood. Thank you, be on your way. [ HANBI’s music fades away ]
[ street noises and chatter ]
[ OOC ] And you get your weapons back, and he supervises as the other guards kind of escort you, pretty forcefully, to the front. All the way, you know, through the hedges, past the skunks, past the gazebo. And you’re back sort of on the street. You have your stuff. You haven’t taken anything else. You weren’t really offered anything. And as far as they know, just - something went wrong with the war machine, and that’s kind of it for now. They were still figuring out what was going on as you were leaving the house.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] With the little guy that disappeared?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] [shouting] Ho ho! That was thrilling! Oh my god, I’m exhausted! I feel
like I was holding a stick up my ass the whole time!
[laughing]
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] Oat, you were incredible!
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Vynos, oh, what a performance!
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] Um - I don’t know of what you speak! [ OOC ] Vynos kind of reminds him that there’s probably a tail on us again that we will need to check for, and lose in order to make sure we get back safely!
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Oh, you’re no fun. [laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Uh, yes. There are definitely human pirates now, from the street, who are just sort of, not at all casually following you, wherever you go.
[ HANBI’s music returns ]
Also, Wet Team: There are now three Fex coming after you as fast as they can, down the hole. > Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Can they get around the big boy?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, I mean, maybe they would have to roll MOV - they would eventually be able to sort that out.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] We’re - I guess, how far do you think we are from this situation? > Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] I mean, Merkis is real far, real fast.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] No I mean me and Zesh.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You and Zesh are like, a beat ahead of them, I think.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Okay.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] I mean, you had a lead, physically.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] I think what Remy’s going to do is he’s going to pull out his endothermic grenade-maker, and finally use it to try and cave in the passage behind them.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] That works.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] I’ll burn 6 GRT. I have to pass a 7 REA check.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] You pull it out, and Zeshdano says - [ IC ] I’ve seen one of these before. I think I used one of these in the field a little while ago. There’s like a weird little button that you hold down on the side when you’re dialing in the atmosphere, and it makes it not so jumpy. [ OOC ] So, she’s using a power called “Give Orders”, and you get a +4.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] You know what, I’m going to not burn that GRT then. [laughing]
9. Hoo! Yes.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] 9! Okay.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] I was gonna say: Zeshdano kind of can’t do anything on her
own, but all of her powers are boosting other people’s things. > Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Yeah!
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Incredibly sick.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Really cool.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Remy’s like - [ IC ] Yo, thanks for the - this makes sense. I was wondering how it compressed that much atmospheric pressure into the small fucking chamber. Didn’t realize it was just the knob. Who knew?
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] So, Wythe, you can explain how this works, or I can explain how it works - do you have a...?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] No, go for it!
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] So, yeah, when you push the button and you dial it in right, you know, previously you’ve seen it sort of crackle and then sputter out, and this, the crackle just increases and increases and increases until there’s [ beep ] a solid arch of electricity between the two ends of the caliper. [ electric hum slowly increasing in volume ] And your hand actually starts to get really cold. And it starts to get cold in the tunnel. And the air kinda starts to feel a little bit dry, and there’s this increasing amplitude of electricity crackling, it gets colder and colder, and drier and drier, and then there’s just this like, medium loud pop [ pop ] and levitating between the two ends of the caliper is basically like a dark blue d20. Like, that’s what it looks like. It’s like this small polyhedral that’s just kind of suspended there between these two magnets. And it is whistling and sizzling in the way that dry ice does when you put a fork on it.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Huh.
[01:54:53] > Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] It’s making this like, terrible screeching noise. And I would remind you that this accessory came with a leather bag and a leather glove for you to be able to handle the material.
[laughing]
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah! So I’m gonna go ahead and say that Remy puts on that glove,
and - Have the pursuers seen us yet?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Oh yeah. One has gotten close, and is running at you, and sees that you have a kind of weapon-like thing, drops to a knee, and pulls out a rifle as big as him, a sniper rifle that’s like as long as his body, and is expertly aiming at you.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah, Remy chucks the thing at the ceiling behind them.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Okay. I mean, I’ll say, you know, you planned this, you did a sort of ambush. So, roll for hit, don’t get a 1.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Roll COM?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, roll COM to shoot this thing where you want it to go.
It’s easy, you just have to sort of hit the general area.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] 8.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Right, it’s a grenade?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yes.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] 8. You hit exactly where you want.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Yes, yes!
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah, I think it’s directly in front of the sniper-
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yes!
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Above, just like the ceiling right there.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] He’s like - [ IC ] Aw, man, that looks bad!
[ OOC ] Uh, what happens? What damage does this do?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] He’s not trying to damage anybody though. Yeah, but I guess, structurally.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] This is like a weird reverse explosion, that then creates an explosion, so it’s kinda like a double explosion? That is -
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Oh, so it’s like a vacuum, and then a rush of air outward?
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Yeah, yeah. That is very cold. So it’s basically, like, a frozen
explosion.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Froz-splosion. Love it.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Froz-splosion is, yes, the technical term. [laughing]
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Froz-po.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Froz-po.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] He made it a fro-zone.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] And it does - it’s 2 x d12 damage.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Okay.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Should I roll that? I mean, I’m just -
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, sure.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] I’m aiming at the ceiling, so it’s like, it doesn’t really matter, I’m not trying to hit anybody.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, I mean, maybe they take half damage. But yeah, you do what you want, if you’re trying to sort of cause a structural problem, and create some blockage.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Yeah. Yeah, cause I think the other thing is like, I’m hoping it caves in the street above so it’s like, harder to follow.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Well, I think they only - you guys are just entering the tunnel, like, they’re just entering the tunnel. So, it’s still basically under the house.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Ooh. Well- !
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] But yeah, you do cave in a bunch.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] That does 19 damage to whatever’s around it.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Damn!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, I mean - I think - you would have killed that guy, but if you’re really trying to blow up the ceiling and not that guy-
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] No, aiming for the ceiling. Trying to make them not follow us through the passage, because of the rocks. [laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, yeah. You have caused big chunks of concrete [ explosion, crumbling rock ] and probably some dirt and some wood, and stuff from above, maybe there’s even some sand filtering in. There is now a bunch of debris between you and the Fex pursuers. They’re also sort of half-frozen, and they’re just really confused. And they’re yelling, like - [ IC ] [trailing away] No! Come back! Bring back the stuff you stole! We know you took something!
[laughing]
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Remy yells back - [ IC ] [trailing away] It was only some wine!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] [trailing away] Aw dude! Dude, that’s good wine! [laughing]
[ OOC ] They’re really hurt, and there’s no way they’re gonna catch up to you if you just run at this point.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] We should - can we go further into the sewers.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, that was going to be my question, is - do you just pop up
onto the street, or?
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Cause they know where we’re going. [laughing] > Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Oh, good point. Okay.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] But, I mean, that’s the other thing, it’s like, do we have - I guess this a game question for the GM, like - do we have enough of a lead that if we came up through the street, they wouldn’t already be there? Cause like, I don’t know how red-alert this was.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] It would make more sense to say you go through the sewers, and then it’s a matter of finding your way through the sewers without, like, dropping, you know, down a waterfall a hundred feet and just getting washed out to sea.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Is Zeshdano able to navigate at all, after her evening in the sewers?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] [laughing]
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Did she learn anything in her travels underneath Graffa?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Roll REA. Yeah.
[laughing]
You’re going down through the dark, down the cliffside water network.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] I rolled a 10.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, you, interestingly enough, you go down far enough, you connect with a passage you remember from just last night.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] I turn to Remy and I’m like - [ IC ] Ah! I’ve been here before. I think I know how to get us out of here. There might be some pirates along the way, and they might look at you kinda mean, but they’re nice, I promise.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You indeed - you know, hook a left, go down a long hallway, you’re in a sort of dry part, this like, weird dry complex carved into the rock. You go up a little
bit, and you do run into some smugglers. Some Wetans who look at you. Maybe one of them even saw you last night, and laughs, and asks if you’re lost again. After a short exchange, they’re able to - they talk a lot about their boss, Shifty, and how big a deal it is tomorrow that Shifty’s gonna meet with Shandy, and with Théyé. And man, they wish they could be there, but they’re gonna be on guard duty in the secret hideout you keep finding by accident, strange human.
[laughing]
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] Oh, sorry. No, I just - sometimes I hit the scabbards a little bit too
hard, and you end up in the underground tunnels of Graffa.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] You know, it’s actually a funny saying in Wetan. “Sometimes a middle-aged human bureaucrat falls down a hole, and you find them, twice in a row.”
[laughing]
I don’t know why that’s a saying!
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] And that’s a good day, and that’s a good day.
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] And that’s a good day! [ OOC ] Yeah, they-
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Zeshdano salutes and says - [ IC ] [laughing] I know, right? “Live, laugh, love.”
[laughing]
[01:59:47] > Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] I don’t know that one, but sure. [ OOC ] They’re charmed. They lead you out. You make your way back through the city in broad daylight, definitely being pursued, but you’ve taken such an oblique route that your pursuers don’t know where you are, and you just sort of wander around the cliffs and then the Escape, and make your way back to Sawpockets and to the building where Grand Shandy effectively is headquartered. Merkis is somewhere below. I mean, I think this could be a great, like - I mean, you guys do whatever you want - but like, what did Merkis do all day while lost in like, this cavern complex, swimming - Like, eventually you hit water, and you’re swimming in fresh water and total darkness, and there’s dangerous things everywhere. Some of them have mind control abilities.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Mhm...
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] This could be a funny - actually, now that you’re saying it, like,
we could do, like, a funny little one-on-one that we release, like, as it’s own audio thing. > Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Merkis gets back, you know, how does Merkis get back to the Grand Shandy’s house?
[ ambient reverberations ]
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] After the teakettle noises, and he’s just sort of resigned to falling, it feels a lot like when he fell through the first portal to Kakudun, and that was a euphoric experience, because he was saying goodbye to Deep River, he was just so, like, in love with that experience, and so he’s kind of taken back to that. So it’s a very peaceful fall. Until he hits the water. [splash] But then another strange thing happens. In Darusan, when lizards are born, they head toward water, and it’s very like - kind of a birth pool situation. [laughing] And so, he just like, emerges on his back, like, floating in this lake, like, oddly, oddly relaxed.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] I think - I would suggest at some point you wash up on a strange sort of beach under the city, and there’s a figure in a cloak that is roughly humanoid, who really wants you to come over and talk to it. Who doesn’t seem to move very well, in the darkness. And I think that could be the beginning of a whole thing. But-
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Fun.
[ reverberations conclude ]
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, it’s not a human, it’s a bunch of rats, it’s two hundred rats in a cloak.
[laughing]
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] In a trenchcoat, basically.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, yeah, exactly. And, yeah, you’re all together. You have the eggs. Obviously, Théyé’s foot soldiers are searching the city for you. Ideally, we’d do like a: How did Dry Team escape the pirates who have been sicced on you?
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Zeshdano and Remy arrive back at the Grand Shandy’s house, and, I guess, Dry Team is already there? And she says - [ IC ] How did you guys - how did you guys escape?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] [ excitedly ] We walked out! Ah!
[laughing]
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Yeah, I guess we kinda did the same thing, except we were running.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Oh, it was great! [ OOC ] And the Dry Team is standing there, and they’re all holding scabbards that have like - promotional scabbards from Scabbards, that are like, not real scabbards, they’re like, plastic scabbards? And it’s like - “Can you drink a whole scabbard of this blue ice drink?” And they’ve all got them.
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah, that says it all, right? You did the same thing, and it
worked again.
[laughing]
I think the only think I would add is I think all of you have d4 extra kaleido-gin tattoos. Like you have random, splotchy kaleido-patches.
[laughing]
Like you had to join a hen party that was really kinda crazy in order to fit in to get away out the back door.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Yes.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] I’ve got a necklace of like, these genitals from some alien species no
one recognizes.
[laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Exactly.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] It’s supposed to be racy, but it’s just a nice necklace.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Oh my god.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] [clears throat] Merkis took one of the pills...
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] Oh god, no.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Oh no!
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] I mean, I don’t know. Beta, do you wanna just try to call him, and see if you can get the skinny?
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] Oh, I’m all out of - I’m too tired to.
[laughing]
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] Okay. Well, fingers crossed Merkis shows up sometime soon. > Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] Yeah. I’m sure Merkis will show up.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Yeah.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah.
[ atmospheric reverberations fade up and away ]
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Six hours later, you hear sloshing footsteps coming up the stairs, and Merkis is drowning in a very ratty cloak. He has scratch marks all over his cheeks and down his neck, and he looks - he has like - his eyes are already huge, but now they have bags under them. [laughing] And he’s like - [ IC ] [groans] Hi... I’m here. [laughing]
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Rough night?
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Very tired, out of GRT, very sleepy. Looks like he got dragged
through the sewer and thrown into a laundry dryer.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ IC ] See, like I said, if there’s one thing about Merkis, he can always find his way home!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] A couple of children run into the room, chasing each other. The human boy chasing this Wetan child. And the Wetan child runs up to Merkis to tag him, like you’re it, and takes one look at him, and the Wetan just like, freaks. And jumps, like springs over the human kid, and bound up, back out of the room, up the stairs. The human kid is more quizzical, but just terrified of, generally of all of you. But especially is just kind of, you know, seventies like, zooming in on Merkis.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Whose eyes are widening and he just slowly brings up a finger to point at the child. [ IC ] Don’t.
[02:04:54] > Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] The child’s lip quivers, and he runs back up the stairs. And his running is stopped. Someone sort of grabs him and, you know, tells him to slow down. And you hear Shandy, basically, instructing him to go check on the others. [ IC ] [ Shandy’s drawl ] And make me a drink while you’re at it. Thanks.
[ OOC ] And you hear - he descends the stairs. He seems exhausted. He has a couple bodyguards with him, they hang back. They all seem very exhausted. Maybe they’re actually spattered in blood a little. He doesn’t explain anything. He just enters the room. No baked goods this time. And says - [ IC ] All right, time’s up. What do we have? Do you have the eggs?
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Zeshdano takes Shandy to wherever the closest refrigerator is, where she’s made room for eight eggs, and a bottle of wine. Of the two that Remy had pilfered.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] It’s a gift for you! The wine. Not the eggs. The eggs was the contract. [laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Right. You could keep the wine, that’s fine, that’s fair game. [ OOC ] It’s just a large wooden bowl with chunks of ice. And the eggs are there. And he inspects them quickly. He just kind of checks that they look hale. And looks at you and says - [ IC ] Uh, great. I’d say this calls us even. So, as far as I’m concerned, the Holder of the Cork Sword - [ OOC ] One of his arms brandishes the cork sword again - [ IC ] hereby makes a deal with you
who have delivered these eggs. And the Grand Shandy will do his best to make sure that the guns stay where they are. Hidden beneath Graffa in one of our hidey-holes, that only myself, Zeshdano, and couple of my most trusted mates know about. Uh - you didn’t happen to kill Théyé, did you?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] No!
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] No sir.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Never!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Okay. Okay, great, great.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] No, no one died.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] But when you see her, tell her we’d like to retract our bid on her house.
[laughing]
That’ll make more sense to her. As she realizes what the con is.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] I also won’t be doing that.
[laughing]
And it’s very important for me-
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] No, you shouldn’t. The second I said it I knew it was a bad idea, I’m sorry.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] You mustn’t let her know that you’re associated with me in any way, from this point forward. So, for all intents and purposes, you were working for someone else, whose name is Shifty. So, if you’re stopped in the street, if Théyé does catch up with you, if you have that argument about real estate, it all comes down to someone else, another Wetan, I know it can be confusing, but not the Grand Shandy. Is that clear? Is everyone clear on this very important bit?
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ IC ] Sure. > Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Crystal.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ IC ] Very clear. > Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] Mhm.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] He has one of the guards come, and he gestures at the eggs, sort of dismissively, and says - [ IC ] All right, take ‘em somewhere safe, take ‘em somewhere secret. Well done! Well done all. Would you like a celebratory drink or something?
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ IC ] Yes.
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ IC ] Yeah, I just got this nice wine, if you’d like a - you know.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Merkis crosses his arms and says - [ IC ] No.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] He sort of notices-
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ IC ] I don’t want any more of these kaleidoscopic patches. [laughing]
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] He notices Merkis, and is like - [ IC ] Fair enough. Right. You’ve learned something on this trip to Graffa, to the merry city of Graffa. Well, with that, I might say - you should probably seek lodging elsewhere, but it has been wonderful to meet you all, to see you again Zeshdano. Pleasure doing business with anyone who can advance the cause.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Zeshdano reaches out a hand for, you know, like, a pirate handshake of some kind, and says like - [ IC ] I appreciate you keeping your word, and I will send some communication to figure out if we need to change the price of the rental, as it were, but-
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ IC ] Ah, yes. Well, we’ll talk vulgar matters of coin at a later date. But sure, you’ll get a bill, essentially. All right! You know where the door is, my friends. Best of luck to yous.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] And with that, you have turned in a job, and when you turn in jobs, you get levels, so-
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Woo!
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] You guys are now Level 3 characters, and at the start of the
next episode, we’ll talk about what you do when you level.
[ military fanfare ]
This also concludes the featuring of Mr. Wythe Marschall. [audience cheering and clapping]
Wythe, thank you so much for running these games!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] No worries! I was surprised you did not choose to fight any of the Fex, or yeah, try to mind-control HANBI, who is very sad.
[laughing]
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Oh, HANBI!
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Wait, how - could we have mind-controlled HANBI?
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] I mean, you can try whatever you want, he has very high WIL,
but sure.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] I guess that’s true.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] You also - do you know whose eggs those were? > Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Oh, interesting!
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] No!
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Oh, I didn’t even think about that.
[laughing]
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] I thought of that...
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Those were Shifty Brink Psalter’s eggs. Not-
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Ah....
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Oh....
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah. Shandy is a genderless drone, and does not have eggs. But those are great, because now he has a hold on the other third of the pirates. So he can actually enforce-
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] Yeah. That’s so funny.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Ah!
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] So, do what you want with that, Mike and Taylor. But-
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] Huh.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] That’s so funny.
> Mike / "Zeshdano": [ OOC ] Ooh. Okay.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] That’s cool.
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] That’s great.
> Wythe / Guest G.M.: [ OOC ] Yeah. Prank’s on you, all around. Pirates? Pirates lie, that’s like rule number one of being a pirate.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] Wow. We’ve been pranked. [Main Theme begins]
[02:09:51] > Mike / “Zeshdano”: [ OOC ] You are now leaving Float City. Thanks for listening.
If you like the show, and you want to help us keep making it, head on over to patreon.com/funcityventures. Five dollars a month gets you access to a whole other show we do called Fun Chatty, it gets you access to our rad-as-heck Discord full of very weird, very smart, very nice nerds, it gets you access to music playlists and more. It’s a great deal, you know you wanna, patreon.com/funcityventures. And of course, thanks to all of our current Patrons for help keeping this ship afloat.
[Main Theme ends] [Outro Theme begins]
> Bijan / “Remy”: [ OOC ] Hi, I’m Bijan Stephen, and I play Remy Tester on Float City. You can find me online on Twitter @bijanstephen (B-I-J-A-N, S-T-E-P-H-E-N), on Twitch at the same name, and on Instagram @bijancakes (B-I-J-A-N, cakes).
> Jenn / “Merkis”: [ OOC ] I’m Jenn de la Vega. I play Merkis Imeldar. You can find me on Twitter and Instagram @randwiches. That’s the word “sandwiches”, but replace the “S” with an “R”.
> Shannon / “Beta”: [ OOC ] This is Shannon Odell. I play Beta Combot. You can find me on social @shodell.
> Nick / “Vynos”: [ OOC ] Hello, this is Nick Guercio, and I play Lux on Fun City and Vynos on Float City. You can find me @nicholasguercio on Twitter, and @nguercio on Instagram. You spell Guercio G-U-E-R-C-I-O.
> Taylor / “Oat”: [ OOC ] I’m Taylor Moore and I play all the cool, interesting characters. You can follow me @taylordotbiz. [villanous chuckle]
> Mike / “Zeshdano”: [ OOC ] My name is Mike Rugnetta, I am your G.M. and you can find me on Twitter and Instagram @mikerugnetta.
You can find the show on Twitter and Instagram @funcityventures. Float City is played in a soon-to-be-released system called Stillfleet, which you can find on Twitter, Instagram and Patreon @stillfleet.
This episode of Float City was recorded at various locations around Brooklyn, New York. It was produced, edited, and sound designed by me, Mike Rugnetta.
“Pixlriffs answered, O thou little virgin of the peaceful valley.
Giving to those that cannot crave, the voiceless, the o’erfired.
Thy breath doth nourish the innocent lamb, he smells thy milky garments. He crops thy flowers.”
Fun City’s music is by Sam Tyndall, HANBI’s favorite song is by Will Savino, Remy’s flute playing is by Jake Fridkis. Our Fun City art is by Tess Stone, and our Float City art is by Ethan Gould. Our Discord mods are Olivia Gulin, Kelly McKew, Kit Pulliam, and Kestrel, and the voice of Artemis is Molly Templeton.
[Outro Theme ends]